Isalm always been my weak point, I have been passionate about it sometimes and sometimes blames all the injustices happened to me on it. Allah has given us, me, so much but at the same time, it felt that, HE has taken away more then he has given me. Life was never easy I think its not suppose to be this way and I dont want it to be this way. The things which I have dont or will do its all the reflection of what Allah wanted me to do. If I were to be a bad person then Allah chooses me to be this way, then y we were being punished. since Allah has already choosen the path for us. I hope and pray that I am not doing a shrik. But to my rekoning I am doing a shikwa which is not a good thing to do but I guess I am in a weaker portion of my imman right now and wanted to do it loudly. What I dont use to understand is that we say that allah is all merciful but what ever was done has to be done by his permission and what ever bad is happening dosent reflect any mercy. I remember last time I prayed Allah did listen to me, my prayers were being answered and then it stopped suddenly, What ever I prayed for remaied unanswered, I really blamed it on to Allah. That Allah dosent want to see me happy and he wanted me to be alone and to do sins. Its his will now and I cannot do anything but to go with the flow, And then I stopped praying and went what ever happens let it be. And as a result now I see myself alone with not even a soul to say what I feel. I wish that those time could go back when I could change the way I was thinking about Allah and his mercy. Now when ever I felt that I could redeem what I have done or thought, I felt that its too late and I will be punished for what I have felt and done. Friends pray for me that I could fight the demons inside me and could be able to strenthen my path. thanks.

HEY !! I'LL PRAY FOR !!!
( SOWWIE ONLY READ THE LAST LINE CUZ IM NOT FEELIN LIKE 2 READ :yawn: )

wat ?

well in ur last line it said tht u wanted us to pray foh u n i said i'll pray foh u n tht im sowwie tht i only read the last line !!!

oh k

k !!

IT'S 2 LONG MAN! SO I WILL PROBABLY READ IT SOME OTHER DAY.... :yes:

:yes:

WHT WAS THT FOR? ARE U GOING TO DO THE SAME THING? :thinkin: