What's your favorite joke?

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And what's the worst joke you know?



One of my favorite jokes is actually a set of jokes:
What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A fridge.
What's blue and white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A fridge wearing a denim jacket.
What's white and checked and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? Rupert the Fridge.

As for the worst joke I know... well, my boyfriend knows a huge amount of horrible and offensive jokes, but I think the lamest one I know is:
A blonde walked in to a bar. It hurt.

what you call a pig with three eyes?
A piiiig

*bum bum tisk*

Hmmm... it's the only one I can think of right now. Brain fart.

How you catch a unique bird?
You 'neek up on it!
How do you catch a tame bird?
Tame way! You 'neek up on it!

My favorite joke:

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin goes, "Whew! It's hot in here!" The other muffin goes, "AHHHHH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

:lol:

I know a lot of fairly good jokes, but my favorite to tell is this:

A woman gets on a bus with her baby, and as she pays the bus driver the bus driver says 'Ooooooh-eeeeee is that an UGLY baby!'. The woman is offended but she does not say anything and she walks to a seat and sits down next to a man. Now the man can tell she's pretty upset about something and so he asks her what's wrong. 'That bus driver just insulted me!' the woman says, and so the man says 'Well you go tell him what's what and I'll hold your monkey!'. :lol:

And probably the worst joke I've heard is one my cousin made up:

What happened to the salad?! THOUSAND ISLAND DRESSING! :O