Okay, as I, at least, seem to keep hijacking various threads to complain about my job, lack thereof, and the frustrations of higher education and as the rest of us get frustrated once in a while too, I decided it was time for a dedicated thread.

I tried to think of a pithy, House related title, but couldn't come up with one. Apparently, the one thing that House does unequivocally enjoy besides bugging Wilson, and riding his motorcycle, is his job.

Wish I could say the same. Or rather, at this point I wish I had a job period, whether I could say the same or not. So, anyone else about ready to give up and either start selling their blood and/or spare organs, or perhaps becoming a plumber? :blink:

What can you get for and appendix these days? :huh:

Good question. I also have a spare kidney and a pair of tonsils I'm not using, if anyone is interested BTW (as well as the appendix), and I could some spare about half my nose since I apparently got in that line twice.

I also just realized, I should have called the thread "House's House of Whining. State your complaint". Shame on me, especially as that episode was just re-run. :rolleyes:

All better! And since it would have ruined the effect last time I'll add it here...


Great topic! We all have our moments at work or in seeking work. Venting a little helps us feel better but it also may prompt some helpful advise from other members.

So, for me all is well with work. The usual assortment of boneheads and idiots (me included!) but all in all nothing to complain about.

This is more of a family complaint. Why do they have to insist on having conversations before a decent hour in the morning, and why do they only talk about money and house repairs. I know they're important, but their's more interesting things in life. My brother would probably disagree with me. And why did we have to decide to re arrange the house the day before my midterm? I know the subject well enough to pass. Oh, and when I get bored enough with the conversation and decide to leave the room, they follow me. I left because, I was going insane sitting their having to listen to stuff I know/ care very little about. If I do say something, they either don't hear or interrupt me.

Anyone want to trade families?

Prpl, it's what families do. I don't think trading would make any difference.

I'm thinking I might go get a job, just to shut my mom up. She's like "you're not doing anything I worked when I was your age blah blah blah. I'm worried about, you you are unproductive." Damn straight I have my whole life ahead of me to be productive. and just because I don't go out every night does not mean I'm depressed. I get depressed when she starts saying I'm screwed up and then I worry. You think she'd realize after 20 years I don't need constant activity to keep me happy, in fact constant activity drives me crazy. Why can't she understand that not everyone is like her? What makes her happy doesn't make rest of the world happy?

You don't have to tell me about it. One of the biggest reliefs when I thought I had a job lined up was finally having everyone off my back about are you working yet? Have you been looking? And before that it was all about when are you going to graduate and you know you can't be a professional student.

Of course after I get a job I realize it will shift to when am I going to get married (when you find me someone as I seem to be having no luck on my own in that regard) and after that, so when will you have some kids? I guess it never ends.

Like I said, I know what you mean. My family is suprisingly supportive too which makes me feel even worse about my lack of progress and I realize that even the semi-strangers who ask me these things are doing it out of concern, but that doesn't stop me from getting very sick of hearing about it all the time.

School, frankly is a valid excuse. I know it's possible to work and go to school at the same time, I've even done it--full time school, part time job and one graduate course and full time job--, but it doesn't mean it's easy. And, it can be done if you need to do it, but I don't know that it's neccessarily worthwhile to do it if you don't need to. As far as getting hands on experience with things you can do that via volunteer work. Frankly, I'm not sure how I managed things when I had the part time job as an undergrad for a few years although those years were when I was still fulfilling a lot of the general requirements so the classes weren't neccessarily as rigorous, still I was a busy, busy girl, and I developed the habit, that I still have, of taking the work with me that I could to different places so that I could get stuff done while I was waiting for people.

I know with the full time job in grad. school, the one saving grace was that there was downtime between customers and I could finish the reading then and handle the writing at home and again it happened I was mostly doing the less writing intensive classes at the time. I noted it was a graduate course for a reason, there is definitely a reason why a full-load for a grad. student isn't as many hours as for an undergrad., you have to do a lot more at a higher level many times.

Sorry, got distracted there. I do think you're right. You have time to get tied down to a job later on, unless there's a reason you need to make money in which case, you've just got to bite the proverbial bullet I guess.

*********************************************************

One of my big complaints is that I run into people who tell me and have told me how hard it is to write-- I grew up hearing that it was a flakey profession and you never make a living at it, and they're sort of right :( , but finally decided that despite continued resistance and logic to the contrary that it was where I was being pushed, though I wonder lately, which is yet another post-- but yet when they hear about my plans the first thing I get asked is You're not giving up on your writing are you ?!?

Make up your minds people, either it's a dumb idea and I should have given up long ago or it's just great and I should go for it (and shut up already about how broke I'm going to be, I know already, 'kay), but if it's the later, some sympathy and support would be nice. I know I'm being ultra-sensitive at the moment because I'm not feeling overly self confident at the moment and they probably mean well too (still if my dad cracks what-my-mom-assures-me-is-a- joke-but-I-have-my-doubts, about how I should have just gotten a degree in business, I may have a complete breakdown on the spot).

It just seems like they want someone out there to be the "artist" but can't reserve any compassion for the fact that it's not easy to do and that, at least for solitary pursuits, it's very lonely. Also, we artist types apparent live on ether and good deeds and don't require remuneration for our efforts in the view of certain of our friends and relatives. I'm happy to work on stuff for you--as a matter of fact I can't complain because I need to buff up my portfolio/resume slightly, so at this stage I'm not actually looking for money at all-- but I can't just whip something up for you on the spot and I do need a little help from you, in other words I do need to be somewhat treated the way you would treat any other person doing work for you. I was talking to a freelance graphic artist once about this and he gets the same thing, though in his case he does need the money, people just ask him to do stuff an figure he should just do it out of the goodness of his heart nevermind that he could otherwise take a paying client and he does have people he needs to keep fed, clothed and sheltered.

Of course the same thing happens to the father of an old friend who is a self-employed CPA. People go to him when they need an accountant, which is great, but they somehow assume that since they're friends or neighbors they don't have to pay him for it, again, same issue, especially as the nature of CPA-dom, for the lack of a better word is odd. As a note my father is a retired accountant, although not a CPA, but he was employed by a company so he had steady income, but the fluctuations are the same. Right around tax season, there's more work, and if you're self-employed, nearly more money than you can possibly do (so in my case if you haven't seen dad except for a quick visit to the kitchen during breakfast time and/or he sort of looks like he came off the worst from a meeting with a semi, and it's overtime again tonight, must be tax season). So friend's father, is tossing down the caffeine and working nearly 24/7 to get as much done as he can and there's pretty much an endless supply of clients no matter what or how fast he works. Then it tapers off, there's still things clients need all year round, but it's nothing like the flood that occurs around when taxes are due.

But the joy of self-employment--and I shudder because fundamentally that will be me and I know far too many self-employed crazy persons as it is, but have no choice but to become one if I want to really be happy apparently-- is that if/when you work, you get paid, but if you're not working you're not getting paid (granted this is sort of true for all jobs, but more so if you're self-employed, if you work for a company then you can take paid vacation, or at least you get paid the same amount every week, if you're self-employed, when you're not in, you eat the loss, and you get paid whatever you make when you are in, if it's a big week, you might get paid more, if it's a bad week, you'll get paid less). So, tax season= boom, big time, the rest of the year=pretty much bust. So back in the day when all the kids were still home right after tax season they'd load up on food to be frozen for the rest of the year and stock up on neccessities and try to squeeze through the rest of the year. I imagine that it's different now that most of the kids are out of the house and don't need their parents to provide neccessities, although there's always still the "Bank of Dad", as I like to call it,--and I don't know for sure what the case is with all the siblings, one older sister and two of the younger brothers are out for sure, but i'm not sure about the other little brother. But this friend is the one I mentioned in an ancient post who has Chronic Fatigue syndrome. Just as a quick summary (not so quick actually), her family wasn't really in a position to pay for all of her college, so she ended up taking out students loans, she went through an undergraduate program in child development/early childhood education, then went to an out-of-state-program to get some kind of universal certification, as she was nearing completion in that program, what turned out to be Chronic Fatigue struck so she came home and never went back. The nature of the beast is apparently, you never feel entirely well, most of the time you feel awful and there's not much you can do to treat it--you try different things to treat the symptoms and ultimately do what makes you feel as well as possible, but there's no direct equation like there is with many other diseases where if you do A, B, C and take D, and E twice a day you'll be mostly back to normal--in that way it's probably a lot like what House goes through or says he does. One thing that does exacerbate Chronic Fatigue though is germs/illness. Consider children around pre-school, kindergarten age, how often do they cover their noses and mouth when they sneeze? how often do they remember to use a tissue to wipe their noses? how big of a priority is really good handwashing? Yeah. And then since they haven't been around for as long as adults their immune systems haven't had time to encounter and start to resist all the "crapola" floating around out there, so, yes they are little germ magnets. So, not only would it be hard for this friend to hold down a job as some days getting out of bed is barely an option, and there's no way to really predict far in advance when it's a good day and when it's a bad day, but the job she's trained to do is not really a good fit for her need to avoid germs as much as possible. In the meantime, the student loan people would like their money back ASAP if not sooner--and yes I believe there is some way to defer things, but I believe eventually, you've got to get them the money-- not a problem or at least not a big problem, when you're out there in the workforce actually making some money, but a major problem if you're not. Also, welcome to the US home of the brave, land of the free, residence of the uninsured.

Just an explanation for Non-US visitors:

In the US generally as a child (under 18yrs) you're included on whatever insurance your parents have, although if for whatever reason, your parents don't have insurance, neither do you, although there is a government program (CHIP) that will provide insurance to low income children, but I'm not exactly sure how this works, you can stay on your parent's insurance a bit longer if you're a student, but eventually regardless of age, you have to get your own insurance if you want any. Most people get insurance through their employer where the employer pays part, and the employee has a fee taken from their salary to cover the rest. If you're self-employed you buy your own insurance and I believe there's special insurance for people who are self-employed, run or work for small companies, it is more expensive though. And you always have the option of just buying your own insurance and paying for the whole thing yourself, but that really costs a lot, especially if you want a good plan-- I had one that would have covered something major, like if I went to the emergency room or had to have surgery, but prescription drugs, and check-ups I had to pay for myself. Generally though if you're not working or not working full-time, which you have to be at most companies to be eligible for their plan, you're not really in a position to be paying for insurance yourself, so voila, you're uninsured. It makes me mad, but at least it's not as bad for me, I'm lucky enough to not have had any major medical crises, and between my parents and myself we just pay for medication and office visits for Dr., dentist, eye doctor etc, but I really hate to have to do it and hate more that my parents have to pitch in so much. This friend isn't quite as lucky.

So my point after these digressions is that money is still tight because they're essentially paying off my friend's student loans, covering her medical needs (she does manage to do enough part-time work for her father that they've managed to qualify her as an employee on the insurance he carries, but it's not much coverage), and they're paying to keep her fed, clothed and sheltered. So, yeah, he's your friend and all, but it would still be great if you could actually pay him for doing something for you.

Also, yes this friend could try to apply for disability, then you get some miniscule payments, some assistance if you need it--like a home health aide, or rehab-- and you're insured by Medicaid--although it's not the most luxurious coverage ever and there are some doctors who now will not take medicaid patients, plus there's more red-tape in that part alone than you want to imagine-- but the process of getting approved is amazingly nerve wracking and complex (you have to submit all kinds of paper work, in triplicate, at least, get examined by a billion different people to prove you're not trying to scam them and so on, though it seems the people who are trying to pull something never have as much trouble as the honest ones), then just because you qualify for something, you may still wind up on a waitinglist, probably wouldn't apply in my friend's case, but say if you had a developmentally disabled child who could benefit from a therapy program, or you would be able to function better with a specific kind of expensive mobility aid, until there's enough money to take care of your needs. If you've read the Hitchhiker's Guide series, try to recall the description of Vogon paperwork-- I believe it was them anyway, must reread I guess-- the one where among other things it must pass through the digestion of some beast or another and then be buried for a few hundred years, this is a breeze compared to filing a successful disability claim in the US.

Once again, I've gone on and on. Sorry.

I start my new job today, in about an hour. Sitting in a coffee shop right now borrowing their internet, which I have yet to obtain at my apartment.

Wish me luck. :ph43r:

Good Luck Sam! I hope it's fun and interesting and that you enjoy it.

I got lost on the way home yesterday, it sucked. I want that half an hour of my life back. :angry:

I'm not doing that again today though, I hope...

Getting lost sucks. I have a hard time getting lost cuz I have a good sense of direction. The only time it fails is when I get turned around without realizing it. I have some friends who have to be on a certain street to get some place. even though I tell them that it run's east to west and you could be on the next street over and still find the place. "I don't know where I am" and it's like "you're a block over" But I can't find anything unless I'm on X street. riiigght so you mean because you turn left and go three blocks then make a right you couldn't go left and and go two blocks and make a right then instead? I'm beginning to understand the market for gps systems, besides on vacation.

I don't know how Nashville is but Memphis is on a grid so if you can figure out which direction your facing and which direction your home is you can usually turn on a random street and find your way back.

Fortunately for me Salt Lake is fundamentally that way too, or at least it is around the downtown area and in SLC proper, so if you're on 5th South and you need to get to 10th you just go five blocks South and you should get there. The keyword of course is should. Every so often there's a dead end or something. Then there are streets that have names too which complicates it. The street I live on is called Michigan Avenue but it's also 850 South. I know that now, but at one time didn't so someone would ask what South is that and I'd have no clue.

Of course the further you get into the 'burbs the less likely the system is to work. That's where the guesswork comes in. And I have to sympathize with Telegram Sam because somehow I always manage to get lost when I go somewhere that's far from where I live and I haven't been there before. I also have to go to a place the same way to remember how to get there if the directions are complex. I also tend to drive by landmarks rather than addresses: I can't tell you for instance that something is on such and such street or you go along here and turn right, then follow for three blocks, I end up more like go until you get to the 7-11 then turn left and go up until you get to the two story red brick house with the really big tree and go right, then there's a playground, etc. . . . It drives everyone I know crazy. It even drives me crazy, but at least I don't panic about it. My catchphrase, well besides freakin' (whatever) and Dude, where's my keys, should be Oh well, we'll just go around the block, but if you're with my dad and he misses his turn, batten down the hatches.

The most confusing place to drive is downtown Denver, Colorado. On the surface it doesn't look bad. Many of the streets, if not all, even seem to follow a grid pattern the problem is since they're revitalized the downtown area--and done a beautiful job I must say-- every other street is literally one-way only so to get somewhere you've got to work around that. On top of that the suburbs of that city are home to my uncle who can't just tell you one way to get somewhere, he has to confuse things by telling you at least three different routes so you can't keep it all straight in your head. :blink:

Oh and to cover the other topic of this post, I managed to get lost on the way to a job interview on Monday. The job is on the campus of the University I went to for my undergrad degree (and there's all kinds of mixed feelings there, on one hand it's very close to my house so for once I wouldn't have a monster commute and really convenient to public transportation to boot, from going there I know it's a good place, etc. but once upon a time I hoped to be back to teach and I guess it could still happen but. . .). I still go there every so often to attend sporting events too, so anyway, I figured I should have no problem figuring out where I need to go (and the woman who called me said they were just three buildings away from the sports arena) and told the woman who called me that, even though the maintenance buildings are located sort of on their own in relation to the rest of the campus. So I got there and looked around for the building and could not find it. I saw a building with a similar number and decided that must be it and I had just written the address down wrong. I went in and found someone still not entirely sure I was in the right place. I wasn't. Fortunately the woman I talked to was very friendly and told me to wait and she'd try to find out where I needed to go. She did, and even called down there to let them know that I was on time, but had gotten confused about where to go. We had a nice chat and a woman from the office I was supposed to go to came up to get me. I apologized profusely and she said it was alright, but what a way to make a good first impression right?

As for the interview, I'm not sure how it went. I think they were reasonably impressed with my qualifications, but perhaps too impressed. The over-qualified thing raised its ugly head again. Plus I'd be working as an office assistant for custodial services which would mean interacting with custodians and the supervisor wasn't sure that someone of my background and education could relate to custodians. I sort of think I could, but he had me doubting it for a while. I guess I look even more like a total spoiled brat than I am. Although really, I've realized I'm the odd one not the people with less education or money. And it's not as if my dream is to spend my life taking calls about backed up toilets in the chemistry building, but at this point I've given up on making anything resembling plans beyond the vague stage--though how to explain that to a potential boss I don't know.

Some other time I'll talk about the absurdity of job interviews, but I've taken enough space as it is.

It's been over 3 weeks since the car place said my car would be ready. I'm very angry at them, I they had said 3 weeks in the beginning I wouldn't have cared but they told us a week. It was first suppose to be done on a friday then it got moved to the next friday then it was last wednesday then friday then monday. Now they're saying wednesday, luckily my mom was able to get them to have ready tuesday since I've been planning to go out of town tommorow. I was able to go to New Orleans in my mom's car since that was just over the weekend but I'm going to be gone close to two weeks. Sorry but, if your going to give estimates have how long it's going to take go way past what you think it's going to take.

Cars suck. I love my Toyota. But when the check engine light came on a week ago, things began to change. I took it to Midas (mistake #1) who supposedly spent all day on it and figured out that it was probably something I did relating to filling up the gas tank. They said they'd driven it around and the light stayed off but if it came back on they would do more testing for free. Hmm. While driving home, I note that they had written down that the oil level was low. I checked it when I got home... it was very low and they had not even bothered to a)tell me while explaining the $89 "diagnostic" fee and b)fill it up. Next day as I'm driving to buy oil (I had driven less than 10 miles) the light comes on again. I take it in the next morning and within 4 hours, they call to tell me that repairs will cost me about $1200 but they can't do it today because part of that $1200 is $125 shipping fee for the parts they have to order. I go to pick it up and discover that they have not tested it for free.. they are charging me another $89 for something they should've done the day before. Needless to say, by the time they guy hands me his business card and tells me that he'll take 10% off the parts ($95) if I have the work done there, I'm thinking of the letter I'm going to write complaining about the whole thing. But on the other hand, I'm nodding my head and handing him my credit card for the $89. GRRR.. I was soooo pissed...

Meanwhile, I have $$, but no income. And $1200 is a pretty big chunk of cash to spend. So my interest in finding a job just jumped up a bit. Even if I have to take some crap job making $10/hour... I'm getting ready to put in my application at Starbuck's.
On a good note, my soccer team won the state cup this weekend and I have a nifty fleece fest to prove it :)

What's with these auto repair places anyway? I've been through similar and they didn't really get on task until I employed my super power of nasty note writing (one of the few advantages of a humanities degree).

The car had a dent, actually a few and we decided to get them all fixed at once, and into the dealer recommended body shop we go.

This is the note I finally wound up sending them documenting what happened--with names and addresses blocked out of course:


Dear Sir,

I am writing to inform you of a problem we have had with the ***** Body Shop, Downtown, located at *******. The history of the problem is as follows,

February 27

We brought our 2000 Plymouth Neon which had sustained damage to the front and rear driver’s side doors and the mirror on the same side in for a repair estimate at the ****** Body shop. At that time, we were informed that replacement parts for the front driver’s side door and mirror would need to be ordered. We were told that the shop would contact us when the parts arrived and that it would take approximately one week for the repairs to be made once the parts arrived.

April 3

As we had not heard anything from the shop, we called to inquire about the situation. At that time, we were told that the parts had now arrived and we should bring the car in to the shop. We dropped the car off that day. We were told that we would be called when the repairs were completed.

April 7

We again called the body shop to inquire if the repairs had been completed yet, as we had been told that they would take one week to complete. At that time, we were told that some of the parts that were ordered were not useable and that they had been reordered. We were told that the repairs would be finished in the next week, possibly by the next Wednesday.

April 12

As we had been told the repairs might be finished at this time, we called to see if the car was ready for pick-up. We were told that the repairs were still not complete, but there was a chance they would be by the next day.

April 13

We called to see if the repairs had been completed and were told that additional parts were needed. These had been ordered and were being shipped. We were told that the car might be ready by the next day, Friday, April 14 or by the next Monday.

April 14

We called to see if the repairs were completed yet. They were not. We were now told that the car might be ready Monday, or possibly sometime during the next week. We called the regional offices of State Farm Insurance, who handle our auto insurance, to see if they could do anything to expedite the process. They say they will be contacting you.

Frankly, customer service of this level is unacceptable. We understand that the unforseen, and unforeseeable, happen from time to time; however our car has now been in the shop for two weeks. In addition, we have not been informed of the delays in finishing the repairs by the employees of the shop, but rather we have had to contact them.

We are puzzled by this lapse in customer service because your shop was not only recommended by our insurance company but we have used it for other repairs and been completely satisfied with the experience. We hope that we can reach a resolution to this situation soon.

The nasty note finally did it, as I suspected it might, but GRRR!!!

Also may I say I'm sick of being over qualified as far as the job thing goes. Apparently none of these people is aware of the job market right now because they all wonder why someone with my degree(s) would be looking for a job as an "office grunt". I feel like jumping up on their desk and asking where these other so-called great opportunities are because I've been looking for over a year now--granted sometimes more seriously than others-- and none of them have popped up yet.

Also, I DO NOT WANT TO HEAR ANOTHER SYLLABLE, LET ALONE WORD, ABOUT LADY/PRINCESS DI!!!! I didn't much care for her when she was alive and I don't feel anymore fond of her now. Yes, I'm sorry that she died, I'm sorry that her sons lost their mother. I'll give you that, very sad indeed. But apparently I missed the part where she was the only person on earth to have self-esteem issues or be cheated on by her husband or not get along with her in laws and furthermore the only person to ever die tragically young in a car accident or at least that's what the media would have me believe about her. Yes, she supported some charities, good for her, apparently no one else does--who knew.

Okay, yes it's hard being a princess and famous and all that jazz, but guess what it's hard being several other things too. Pardon me for taking a cynical view, but life is, from what I've gathered, one long hard, "hard" after another.

For instance it's also quite hard being unemployed despite having an advanced degree, or being worried because your parents are getting older and you're the one who'll have to take care of them, and when they're gone, you'll be all alone because you're just not good at the whole socializing thing, and wondering if the talent you supposedly had is gone for good, or why you're definitely living up to expectations or whatever your potential was supposed to be, or else someone was really lying to you, and the list goes on, and admittedly even that isn't that bad (as much as I'd like everyone to say oh, poor, put upon Catlady, in unison, I do realize that I have it relatively easy in that I did get to go to school and I do have a roof over my head and many other factors that make me far from pitiful no matter how sorry I may be feeling for myself).

I apologize for that brief journey into my litany of sorrows and my bitter outlook, but please, she wasn't that great. Can we please stop hearing about her.

Then there's the fact that the commercials on A&E for a special on her life and death have me stuck on a version of David Bowie's Modern Love, that I can't decided if I love or hate. . . .

Yea we had body damage, it wasn't all at once. My dad for some reason thought that if we fixed it I'd totalled based purely on the fact my brother totaled a car right after they put a new engine in it. It was suppose to get done while I was at school so I could have a nice car over the same and nevermind that they lefthead light didn't work. I keep pointing out that if they had did what they had promised this would not be happening I would not have to wait to leave to go out town. The body shop is a block or two from where I live it wasn't like it was out of their way it was even on the way to work for them.

The thing is we've been to this body shop before and the guy knows us and he's usually very good about getting things done on time. It wasn't totally their fault they (My dad and them had to fight with insurance so they wouldn't total the car) then a part took forever but once they had all the parts they should have been done when they said after they got the parts.

I don't think I knew princess di existed until she died and everyone made a big deal out of it. I don't care either way I've been able to avoid all the hullabaloo that's been out lately. Some kid who went to my highschool for at least a while but graduated from another school died in a car wreck a few weeks ago, I still don't remember him. But my friend who was interning in Philly Imed me and told me I got quiet because I was trying to figure out who he was, I suck with names. She asked if I was alright I said yeah. I didn't want to be rude and ask who? even though I had no clue who he was. Thankfully a bunch of people joined memorial groups on facebook for him. I still don't remember him. It's terrible that he died but why should I join some group/go to a funeral/memorial/ cry if I don't know him? If someone doesn't know me I don't want them at my funeral I want only people I like and knew. especially since I've never cried when people I have known died, yea I feel bad and I miss them but I don't cry at funerals. Of course the only person I know really was my grandpa and he was suppose to die 6 months ago so I had already grieved. I did cry when my enviromental science teacher died, but not at her funeral. I don't know if I forced myself to since I would spend time in her room after school and all these people who barely knew her were crying or if I had just sat their tears would have come naturally. This isn't to say I don't miss her, I do.

It was suppose to be done at noon but now they're saying 4:30 I did not want to be driving after dark. this is the 5th time they've moved up when it's suppose to be done since getting all the parts in. I'm very pissed at this place have things done when you say.

First off, Congratulations Nomad on the championship!!

Next, sorry to hear about all the garage woes.

Up until a few years ago I did all my own repairs on my cars. I'm so glad I pressed my father into teaching me all that stuff. But these days with all the computerized crap monitoring and regulating the engine it's hard to do that anymore. I still do oil changes, minor tune-ups and brakes but the rest I take to the shop.

And, fortunately, I have found an above average shop. They do great work, they are very good with their time and cost estimates and very rarely miss their mark (and when they do it's usually only a day at most. Most times only a few hours), they call as expected and they are only a little above average in price. But, I think paying a little more for that kind of service is worth it.

I hope you all get things resolved in a way that is to your avantage.

My dad has a program on one of his laptops that he hooks up to his car and it tells him exactly what is wrong with it. Sadly what was wrong with mine was that it needed body work, it runs great just had a few dings in it from highschool and not always being awake enough in the morning to realize I should have waited an inch before turning. or being overly tired from a long drive and running into the trailer hitch of an suv in front of me. the sad thing is all the damage happened me going under 5 miles an hour luckily only been in one crash that involved damage to another car. That's because the intersection is the most confusing one, it turns out that if you have a wreck at that section unless you're just rude the judge will take it off your record which is nice, but also points out how dysfunctional the intersection is

Now they're saying noon tommorow

thanks rt :) it's nice to win- especially when it's a good fight!

i changed my oil a few times back when i was living in Germany and had access to a)a garage and b)mechanical assistance from the pros. Unfortunately, I didn't practice and now i'm clueless. I'm relatively technically inclined, but I'm scared to death to touch my car less I destroy it. So I called the toyota dealer- who promptly informed me that the sensor Midas told me was busted up didn't show in their system on my car. So must be something else or under a different name. They also quoted me over $100 less on the charcoal canister than Midas. And the winner is...!!! Unfortunately, they will have to do diagnostics again... which is $106 ($17 more than Midas...). Bummer heh? But at least I know that they actually know what they're doing since they ONLY work on Toyotas.

Rant of the evening is this: for the past few days I have been umistakably hungry. I eat cereal with yoghurt and fruit in the morning (and coffee), a half sandwich with soup or veggies or my yummy (yes really) soy flax tortilla chips for lunch, and cook something for dinner (last night salmon, sweet potato, salad; tonight thai chicken wraps) I work out between lunch and dinner- at least one hour- running 45 minutes usually, or biking an hour, and doing weights/situps as well. But seriously starving- especially after dinner. From about 8-10. Horrible. Worst time to eat. Seriously. Stop it. I tried gum and water tonight until finally drinking some manufactured coffee flavored drink that seems to have done the job. WHY??? Stupid body thinks its gotta make up for lost calories...

I got my car back and now in Ky. It turns out they worked as fast as they did, and part me knew that. I was more mad at the fact that we didn't take in until we did. I almost took my mom's car but its been acting strange as in the radio barely works and the ac randomly stops working it was about 100 the whole drive and she thinks the electrical system is going out and didn't want me breaking down in the middle of nowhere.

After almost 2 months of half-assed applying to jobs, I got an invite to an interview for "law office assistant." blech. I almost didn't call back, but after careful consideration, I figured- why not? If I don't want the job, I don't have to take it.... so just interview and get it over with. So I call back. The lady asks if I can interview and I say something like "sure." Either she was in a bad mood or my cruddy mood about the job wore through because she says "you sound skeptical..." I laughed... uh... no lady, that's just the way I talk. Anyway... next up: I have to gather 3 professional references by Wed. ACK! Okay okay.. I know I should've done this 2 months ago (or actually when I quit my job) but ssheeee-it. I've got one in the bag... but the other two are very debatable and up in the air. I'm so screwed.

I don't want to be the designated driver. I'm always the god damn driver, this is one of the reason's why I chose to go to school in chicago. I'm too nice and I'm all about not killing people or crashing the car or going to jail. Of course people always are like "I'll drive next time, I promise" hahaha yea right. I'm tempted not to go I know it's her birthday but it's one day. I also am getting the feeling from her she's being nice so I will come bring D with me since he's one ticket from losing his licsene and his parent's won't let him drive to nashville. so of course I have drive, never mind I just got back from Ky and even went up to Pittsburg last weekend to see my cousin. I'm really really tempted just to not go, I have so much to do in a week before I go back to Chicago. So I technically have two but I'm losing 4 days to go to Nashville. Yes I had all summer, but who actually doesn't procrastinate until the last minute? I think I should get some sleep maybe I'll feel better about this tuesday when i'm suppose to go to nashville. Her parents already got us a hotel, so it would be rude to not go and I've never actually been to nashville I've been through it but never stayed over night.

Yeah, it's odd how the joys of being able to drive, and many other adult priveleges we longed for--being old enough to get a job comes to mind--, pale so quickly once we experience them. Right after you get your licensce, provided you're not a huge scaredy-cat like I was and even then. . ., you're looking for excuses to drive anywhere. Soon it's, "Oh man, is it my turn to drive again? Do I have to?" Of course designated driving adds a whole new wrinkle since if you do drink, you have to give up something to fulfill that role. In that case the task definitely needs to get spread around.

What brings me here tonight is one serious complaint and one frivolous one. The serious one concerns my continuing job hunt and the messed up state of my mind. A community college with which I've applied to teach before is looking for part time faculty again. My lack of formal teaching experience sort of hinders me, although and I really need to emphasize this more, I did have a class that was title Effective Presentations, but what it really focused on was catering to adult learners and different learning styles it's just it was framed as how to use those things to help you give a presentation or facilitate a meeting, but fundamentally the same things apply to teaching a class, at least at college level or above--though I, and many others suspected that certain things would be useful for working with any student. On top of that I've taught things informally before, and at a certain point in creative writing workshops the students often teach as much as the teachers--really the teacher is more a facilitator (keeping things moving, directing what needs to be addressed, etc.) rather than someone who lays down hard and fast rules beyond the basic rules of formatting, using good grammar/usage, basic conventions, that kind of thing. And well, I had a high school creative writing teacher, who was brilliant, who would often say, "Okay, you guys are advanced creative writing students and/or you're the <fill in section> editor (s) of the literary magazine this year, so teach us". Scary, but fun in the end.

Anyway, at one point I thought I could manage even without having formally taught. After several encounters with my own incompetence and a long, mostly fruitless job hunt, I'm not so sure. So on one hand (and this applies in a few other job situations too), I'm getting tired of being unemployed, if for no other reason than I'm sick of answering questions, though it does actually go deeper than that, and this might be a possible stepping stone to where I'd like to wind up in part, but on the other this could be "D-day" of sorts. There will be no more assumption of whether I can teach or not, I will find out for sure and since a lot of my ultimate plan if things go right does hinge on teaching, it could be very devastating to find out I can't do it.

Yes, I'm passionate about it, some people might even think I was moderately knowledgeable (and I doubt for these classes I would be in charge of coming up with a syllabus, just for teaching the material), but as anyone who's been through school knows, there has to be a step beyond being passionate about your material so that you can at least partially get the students engaged in it even if they don't fully feel the same level of passion. So I'm afraid I won't get the job and equally afraid that I will. What a mess!

Now for the trivial. Why must Poptarts come two to a package? I have been craving Poptarts since sometime this morning. There are some Poptarts in the house even. Of course I eat enough junk and am not exactly svelte or worse, not exactly in shape, so I don't really need that Poptart. I could just eat one Poptart, have my fix for a few months and move on with the harm being less severe than it could be, but two to a package remember. So if I want one the choices are open the package, just take one, and leave the other one to go stale--someone might eat it before then, but maybe not-- or in order to avoid wasting food-- I come from a long line of tightwads and pack rats and people who are worried about the starving children in the world who would be happy to have that food, etc. and so forth-- I can eat both Poptarts and feel guilty for eating too much junk--which I will anyway for just eating one, but that guilt will be times two (one unit of guilt if you will, per Poptart). So far the decision is forego Poptarts entirely, have a good rant.

I'm not entirely convinced pop tarts are food. more like cardboard with a sweet sticky substance in the middle. Not that I don't like that, I do just not my favorite food. I'm also shocked at how one of my friends is still alive based on her refusal to eat nothing but cheese and bread and hamburger plus ketchup. This girl is 19 and get a soft taco with just melted cheese in it, because the quesdia at taco has some weird spicy sauce (I don't know, I can't see how she eats half of what she eats. At mcdonalds she gets a cheese burger with nothing but mayo, ketchup, and mustard. I get everything in hopes of masking the taste of their beef (100% beef my ass, more like 100% textured paper product pretending to be a hamburger)

As the teaching thing, I don't know what to say. Either you can or can't teach. It's probably helpful if your students make an effort to learn. I don't know. I don't want to teach, to many strange people I have to pretend to care about futures of. either way good luck on the job finding. I can't empathize since I've never had to worry about working, and have no plans to becoming useful until I'm 30 at least.

I have a cousin that sounds about like your friend, at least in regards to how he likes his hamburgers. When he was younger we went to this local drive-in that I've talked about in other posts and he ordered their specialty burger but said, I don't want lettuce, tomatoes, ketchup, pickles, and essentially went down the line of all the toppings when the waitress taking our order said "You know we have a plain cheeseburger (which amounted to the burger, cheese and a bun), maybe you'd rather have that". Cue the rest of the group trying to casually slide under the table so we could pretend we weren't really with him. He's still the same as far as I gathered from the last time we ate in each other's company. Although I do understand how he survives: he won't eat much variety-wise, but he makes up for it in quantity. So starvation is not a worry, scurvy however. . .

Micky D's does pretty much stink, although their shakes and their yogurt parfait aren't bad. As for Poptarts, I'll agree they are cardboard with frosting and filling, but for some reason that doesn't stop me from craving them every so often and which is part of the reason why I feel bad about eating them.

Yes, definitely, don't try to be productive until you hit thirty. Unfortunately for me, I've already hit it, and slid down the side, semi-squashed so there's no more escape there from.

I am kind of proud of her. she tried the mexican pizza from taco bell and liked it. Fine it wasn't fancy mexican food or good at that but it's a step up from flour tortilla with melted cheese in it. Maybe I'm just too critical. Some how I don't see her not failing/dropping out of her major. Which is Pharmacy, she's smart but not when it comes to math or science. I'm better at it then her and I hate math and science nor have taken any complex math or science courses in 3 years. And I keep telling her that 18 credits is too many to take 1st semester and that she's insane. Never mind that shes uses people to get what she wants. Had people do her homework through out highschool, and is so use to getting everyone to do everything for her. Her parents won't tell her no out of fear of hurting her or something. I tried telling her that people usually don't care, if you're feelings get hurt or if you fail.

And yes I realize there are people who do care, but not everyone. In fact not most. Sure the basic person would help you pick up something you dropped if they happened to walk by when you dropped or hold the door for you. Maybe even let you over during rush hour. I mean I do all those things but I'm also not changing anyone's future by doing so. It's just how I am, I have a habit of saying thank you to the cashier or who ever helps me out. I also don't know these people so i have no reason to be mean to them.

I have no complaints about life currently.

Oh, and when I asked how she wasn't dead yet, she replied "I went to the hospital alot as a child" don't know why her parents didn't make her eat other food.

Hey! 30 is the new 20! At least... that's what I keep telling myself.

So does that mean 20's the new 10? ewww that's kind of creepy. That would make 10's the new single digits and the new single digits non existant. Hey if their non existent then that mean's they're not their and you shouldn't talk to things that aren't their, people might look at you weird. (Not that I know) and that means I shouldn't talk to children under 10 since they haven't been born yet.

Nomad, I hope so, I sure hope so.

And I am in awe of anyone who can do pharmacy. I too am horrible at math and some sciences. I liked biology a lot it was interesting and sort of made sense to me even though the last biology class I took, which was Biology for Biology majors (I was one ever so briefly aiming for pre-med, then the insanity passed) kicked my butt (it kicked everybody's however and was rumored to be a "weeder" class). I did okay at math, but didn't especially enjoy it until I took Trig., I don't know if it was the professor (who I didn't particularly care for in either personality or teaching style), the TA (who I liked better, but who did things entirely different from the way the prof taught us to), my own stupidity finally catching up with me (like I said, I never liked math and I usually wasn't the first one to understand a concept although I usually got it eventually, parallel to the question about what you call the person with the lowest passing grade in medical school, ans. Dr.) or all of the above, but I tried my guts out in that class and only came away with a D+. Being the perfectionist I am, that still smarts to this day. Then of course Chemisty and Bio-Chemistry (from the preview I got of it in the aforementioned Bio class) were nightmares. My experiences in high school chemistry could take up a whole post of their own, so I won't go into it other than to say it was far from a positive experience.

I would be worried about her too though if that's been her experience. And most of all shame on her parents for not teaching her about life or telling her no at age, say, eight or sooner, let alone at 18 or 19. I mean, yeah you have to take care of your kids and to quote Dr. Phil (who I grudgingly admit I like, though I'll claim I watch the show for the trainwrecks that come to him for help if you confront me about it), be a "soft place to land", but you also have to prepare them for the world and that means teaching them that they can't always have everything they want just because they want it or at least they can't get it immediately, and that other people were not put on the earth to serve or entertain you. Like you I try to treat other people nicely and say please and thank you and help if I can because that's the way I was raised to be, and I do think that it changes the world in a small way, sort of like the whole pay-it-forward thing or the commerical for the insurance company the name of which I can't remember (it starts out with a woman stopping a pizza guy who almost walks out into the street, which is observed by another man, who later helps a woman lift her stroller off the bus and so on). Still the key word is help, not do for you.

What I mean is sometimes things happen or you have a bad day. If most of the time you do your share of the work, and especially if you may have helped me out before, I'm happy to take up the slack if something happens and you get in over your head, but if you consistently end up behind and other people always end up having to cover for you, it's going to reach a point where I say "Sorry, but I'm afraid you're on your own this time". Or if you get me in an especially bad mood or when I'm feeling stressed out you may get a lecture/emotional outburst of epic proportions instead.

This also is the portrait of the kind of student I'm hoping to partially avoid by not teaching high school. Granted, this is theoretical and might change once I've taught a while. Like I said, if you're doing your best but still having trouble in the class, or some emergency comes up, then I have no problem with helping you as much as possible. But if you're going to mess around and then expect me to bail you out at the last minute, it's not going to happen. I know you've talked about slacking off in classes, but that's a different story, as a teacher I wouldn't be fond of it, but the difference is you understand that in slacking off your grade is going to suffer. It's the ones who slack off but somehow still expect to wrangle themselves into an "A" that bother me most, or the ones that at a high school level would sic their parents on you for not giving in to their demands. I guess people's parents might still do this at a college/university level, but I can't think of a professor that I had at least who wouldn't have laughed in their faces when it happened.

Thank you for being kind to cashiers and others of their ilk. Like you said, you don't know them, so why should you be mean? And anyway, they are people not automatons as some people seem to think. I suspect some people get an attitude because they're Drs. lawyers, business people, or married to them, whereas you're working for minimum wage, so naturally, they imagine they must be better than you are, but they neglect a few things that should weigh into importance in the world. First of all not all people who are working as cashiers or other jobs of that type are planning on staying in that job for the rest of their lives, for many it's a way to make money while they develop other skills by going to school. Aside from that--and I'll admit I was guilty of making this mistake for a while-- a lot of the minimum wage, really dirty jobs are ones that society would be far worse off without or even might not work without. I mean, I'm supposedly smart and all that, spent plenty of time on the Dean's List as an undergrad, can quote obscure pieces of literature and random facts, I've even got a Masters--though I always feel compelled to let everyone know that it was a pretty easy program compared to some-- but when my car breaks down I haven't a clue what to do about it aside from calling someone who may have only a high school education and tell them I'm bringing it by for them to look at (granted being a mechanic requires more knowledge than it used to with so much being computerized, but it still gets looked down on and both mechanics I know do not have a college education of any kind or even trade school), likewise, especially as it's in the news and on my mind considering I'm from Utah, coal miners. It's not a fun job, it's dangerous under the best circumstances and many times safety gets skimped on, it's dirty, sweaty and hard. The people who do it may not come across as the most sophisticated or educated people on earth and for the most part they aren't, although I'd wager some are quite smart, just not formally educated, but if they weren't down there doing what they do, there'd be no coal, which still powers a lot of electrical plants, and without electricity we'd all be in a world of hurt.

Sorry about that, but it's another subject I've become sort of passionate about. I guess that's one thing came out of my initial school plans not working out: I've become much less of an elitist snob about everything and sort of disgusted by people who are that way. Anyway, I can tell you having been in a similar position to a cashier that someone being nice did change the future short term as if a customer was polite and patient with me then the next few customers afterward would tend to reap the benefit of my good mood.

Of course, as I've said before, I was always taught that my default attitude should be minimally polite and that included towards "service people". Unlike my parents, if you give me reason I will and can be very rude, but it was all about respecting other people. Apparently this is not a lesson that everyone gets. Just like apparently not everyone got the message about cleaning up after themselves (to a reasonable extent) and being responsible for their own decisions. You've all heard that rant from me before, so I'll spare you.

This may be because I come from a suprisingly working class background for my education. Both my parents went to college and on my mom's side I have one uncle who was an orthopedic surgeon before he retired and another who was an electrical engineer, my mom has a degree in business. My dad is the only one out of his siblings to go to college though and probably wouldn't have gone if it hadn't been for the GI Bill. This is not to say that my aunts and uncle on that side of the family weren't/aren't smart, they are, but they just didn't get the education (there's that difference again, plenty of people who are smart aren't educated and I can tell quite a few educated people aren't all that smart). When you get back to the grandparents though no one went to college. Neither of my mom's parents even finished high school (as a matter of fact my grandmother didn't even go to high school, her family needed her to go to work instead; again very smart woman, but forever embarassed by her lack of education even though judging from what my mother's told me about her she may be the one I get my talent with words from). This grandmother cleaned houses with her mother and later took over entirely for her mother when she couldn't work anymore. That grandfather eventually worked in a management position but he worked up there from pretty much the bottom, being the janitor and going around installing phones and checking lines-- he had toe curling stories about his adventures in pole climbing and crawling around in attics with candles), after having worked in various odd jobs including stoking steam engines and working on a road gang. My dad's parents both finished high school and my grandma must have gone to "teacher's college" because that's what she did before she got married, but first my grandfather was a coal miner (around the area actually where Crandall Canyon is) and then decided to become a barber. Both of them came from families that farmed. So basically my parents were raised by people who knew what it was like to have to work hard at jobs that weren't always very pleasant or well paying and who also live through the depression, thus having a pretty good concept of what it was like to be really poor. And I'm conscious enough of all this to realize that I'm not really that many generations away from those kind of jobs myself; but for about fifty or sixty years one of those people who is digging up coal or mopping floors could be one of my grandparents. It surprises me how easily some people forget that, as I'm far from the only one with that kind of background.

And taking 18 hours virtually any semester is madness, let alone the first one. I did 20 once and that was more than enough to show me that I didn't want to do it again. That was when I was a senior and pretty used to the way things worked, plus some of those were an independent study project (I translated a short story from German into English and oddly I'm still proud of how it turned out) so that I had to do work, but didn't really need to do much in the way of attendance other than check up with the professor who was supervising me every so often to let her know how I was doing and to get her to approve the story I chose to work on. As you know, regardless of what kind of student you are-- I've known people who were very smart and very good students and that first term just knocked them back-- that first term of college, sometimes even the whole first year is a little bit of a shock. Some people do better than others, but from a voice of experience, it's definitely better to ease in. And it sounds like from the kind of person this girl is, she may have a very hard transition what with "Mommy and Daddy" not there to bail her out.

Why why why do my professors have to wait till I'm already taking a full course load to ask for my help with every possible thing in existence? I love my professors and I'd love to do the stuff they're asking for and I'm flattered that they thought of me, but it means I either have to say yes and wreck myself physically and emotionally like I did two years ago or say no and feel guilty for not helping out. I'm already an officer in my choir, which means I have to plan our trips and run rehearsal a lot and teach songs to the choir by myself, and I'm in this jazz group that I still feel like I shouldn't be in because I have no experience with jazz singing, and I've got a two-and-a-half hour physics lab every Wednesday that frankly kicked my @$$ and sent me to bed with a migrane this week and doesn't look like it'll let up, and I've got a two-hour-and-forty-minute education class (!!!!!!) that as far as I can tell is a colossal waste of time that I could otherwise dedicate to learning double the usual number of songs for voice lessons because my senior recital is next semester, and I haven't even started my job yet and IT'S ONLY THE FIFTH DAY.

And yeah, I say "thank you" as reflex too. Probably a lot of Southerners do. The problem is that if you live down here you know that "thank you" can mean everything from "thank you" to "*%&$ you," and it takes some experience to translate.

Yea, I hate the south, I'm getting out of it. It's too hot and sticky and their's nothing to do. And some people have awful red neck accents that just grate. Not to mention their's this collective ignorance down here. I know their's collective ignorance everywhere, but still I haven't lived other places my whole life.


Luckily mommy and daddy are three and half hours away so they can come when she needs them. I could not go to school closer then 5 hours from my parents. I love my family but I also love them far away. Never mind that she can't do laundry, even though me and a mutual friend told her how to do it, yet she refuses and is using the school's laundry service. Plus the machines are free at her school. WTF! mine cost money, if I had free machines I'd defiently not be using a laundry service. She's also very rude to her parents which I don't understand, I mean yes parents can get annoying, but you should humor them especially if they're giving you money and paying for your education. Of course an hour after me and the mutual friend left she called saying she missed us. It had only been an hour. Sorry but please an hour it not long enough to really start missing someone.

Compared to a lot of people I had a pretty easy transition from living at home with parents to living on my own, but I've been taking care of myself since middle school at least (as in getting myself up, doing my laundry, etc) So when I left for school it wasn't too bad. The bad part was I didn't know anyone where I went, which made it lonely. At the same time I knew what I was getting into. Infact I find it harder to live with my parents, and after this summer I'm staying up in Chicago, except to visit for a week or two. I also was a year older then alot of the other freshmen, I'm not sure how much of a difference that made.


I have a week to go through boxes and pack for school. I don't want to.

You guys are having way too much fun over here whining and all... and as I have not many better things to do (mostly because my eyes are droopy from too little sleep and I don't want to go to the gym because I know it will be disappointing) then I figured I'd join in.

Definitely be worried about the Pharmacy friend. The #1 thing that got me on that was people doing her homework for her. Either she'll make it big on the shoulders of everyone else, or she will dig herself a deep one. And if she's trying for 18 credits first semester, then I'll bet on the latter. Not that 18 credits is impossible. When I look back on my undergrad days, I took between 12-15 hours every semester while playing soccer (which was another 2-3 hours at least per day... which translates to more than 18 credits if it actually counted). And I wasted a LOT of time bullshitting around and procrastinating and managed to get mostly A's and a few B's. I did my work and went to class and (mostly) stayed awake... so I wasn't a complete slacker. I just know I could've done more or better. And I was afraid of math and science due to a terrifying calculus class in high school (my only report card B in the whole 4 years). But now that I'm far away from those times, I realize that I could've probably majored in a science and SHOULD have majored in a science- especially since I live in AK and almost everyone I know up here is either some sort of scientist or doctor or engineer. And me with my nearly obsolete masters in forensic psych. Ugh.

Let's talk about the South (this is now my bitchfest). I'm originally from the south- born, raised, and even have an accent if I'm around my family/friends. My friends elsewhere pick on me for my lack of accent (which suddenly comes forth while on the phone with my mother). But everytime I go back there, I am amazed by the ignorance. And it is collective. Having lived in 2 additional states and one other country and traveled relatively extensively, I've realized that the majority of people I know there live in this bubble where they are right and everyone else is not. I don't know how else to explain it- but they just can't see the outside at all. I try to explain that there are other viewpoints, that they don't see the whole picture and can't even imagine it- but they believe there's a certain way to doing things. My family, for instance, grates my nerves about service workers and wages. (inevitably, politics emerges as a topic when I go back and it's never pretty). So service people- you know the people who work at McDonald's or whatever... my family treats them with respect, but they don't seem to understand that these people need to make a decent wage so that they can afford to live . When I explain to them that you can't live off of $5.15 an hour- and especially not if you have kids, they simply respond that the person needs to get a better job. When I explain that some people out there just aren't capable of getting a "better" job, they scoff and contend that the person should've thought ahead and done better. As if this were the answer to everything. I'm not claiming to know the answers and certainly I am aware of cost-benefit issues and capitalism's primary philosophies... but I'm at least aware that there are a bazillion reasons for actions and outcomes and you can never pinpoint just one (Chaos Theory, anyone? I got a B- in that class my freshman year... it was a really really hard honors math class with 4 senior math majors and 2 freshmen). I can also say that before I left Georgia for Virginia (where my first roommate was a liberal from DC), I was as closed minded as any of them- didn't understand why the state flag (at that time, a version of the confederate flag) needed to be changed, believed in the death penalty, and took the stand if we did anything horribly wrong to our environment, the Earth would right itself without our aid, etc etc. And it really brings forth the issue of the kids that grow up there and never leave. It could be a self-perpetuating cycle despite the influx of media and internet. My siblings are intelligent, but they too are in this cycle of ignorance. It's not about the degrees or intellect either- but about the people with whom you associate and your family.

And prpl- it's not that there's an entire generational set-back- it's that there's now a kind of free adolescence between 20 and 30 for those that want it. I spent half of my 20's working crap jobs and being a snowboard/travelling bum. then I went to graduate school. Then I joined the "work force," got really cynical, traveled for a few months, and now I'm bsing around and trying to find a job that I like before I actually DO hit 30. And my closest friends have done the same thing- some of them even putting off college entirely until their late 20's. And in my "dream career" apparently, you are considered "young" if you enter it before the age of 31-32- which I think is more and more true for a lot of "careers" for the simple fact that you're trying things out for the first 5-10 years. Unlike my father's generation, who stepped into a career out of college and remained there for 30+ years. So on that note... oh but wait-. Catlady somedays I'm horribly disturbed by 30 and the fact that I haven't "accomplished" anything, don't have a husband or kids (not that I want them..), and own practically nothing. And other days, I feel really good. Especially when I realize that I'm almost there and I can run further and faster than I could when I was 20. Tomorrow, I may shoot for 10 miles when 10 years ago, I hated everything to do with running and could barely make 3.

Now I'm done. I've got Season 3 House now... hee hee... Oh Sept 25 just can't come soon enough! :rolleyes:

On everything, I hear you on the south. I've never lived there but from hearing about it the fact that Southern Utah is sometimes called Utah's Dixie is more appropriate than anyone can imagine as many of the things that drive people nuts about the south happen there too. We even have our own bizarre redneck accents that sometimes sound almost southern. I've always live in Salt Lake which is urban for Utah, but kind of middling for everywhere else. My uncle--who grew up here, but moved to Georgia for about twenty years once he was finished with is medical training-- and I used to enjoy laughing at the response of people in his adopted state to any kind of inclement weather. The weather in Utah isn't that extreme compared to some places, though lately it has the distinction of being around the same temperature as hell in the summer and then positively arctic in the winter. Ah, life in the high desert I guess. Anyway, we do get snow pretty much all winter and every so often there's a really good blizzard. In the twelve years of my public school experience however school was close exactly twice due to weather and there were quite a few days where everyone was doing doughnuts and sliding all over the place. This may be due to crappy drivers--we've got more than our share, but generally after living here awhile you adjust even if sometimes it takes that first winter storm of the year to remind everyone of the facts (we do like to blame it on the California transplants though I fear some natives get in on the act too). The essential thing to remember is 4-wheel drive helps you start, but it does nothing to help you stop. :blink: Anyway, uncle grew up and learned to drive in this environment as well as with the ocasional fog, "the inversion", that causes you to have to drive with your head out the window so you can see the lines on the road. Anyhoo, this was in contrast with Georgia where water falling from the sky even in small amounts was apparently a sign of the apocalypse. Then don't get me started on ya'll versus all ya'll. ;)

I hear you on the thing with people not understanding that sometimes planning ahead can't help. Especially with some reforms, there's just no way for some people to get out from under whatever got them in a bad situation to begin with. It's sad to see, but unfortunately reality. Oh, yes, and my family, especially my mom and I, have decided that it's just better if we dont' discuss politics. I'm a complete pinko "wobblie" and admit it, they are nice conservative people. With the extended family more than with my parents, it's seriously like dealing with Archie Bunker ( "Would it make ya' feel any better, little girl, if they was pushed outta windas?" in response to the gun control issue).

I don't want to paint my situation as being on the parallel of someone who has to stay with a minimum wage job but I do get the thing with why didn't you plan ahead. I've told my journey to where I am before, but believe me, it wasn't a matter of choosing to study English and try to be a writer in defiance of anything else. I actually resisted it about as long as I could. Yes, I could possibly have gotten a degree in business, but I would have hated every minute of it and my subsequent career. Maybe some people can work in something that they don't believe in and be content, if they can I envy them greatly because my life would be easier if I could, but I can't. Even in the subsets of things I'm qualified for I know there's stuff that would just drive me nuts and I would subsequently either have a nervous breakdown or be the worst employee ever. Man do principles suck! Sorry, I'm a bitter, bitter girl lately.

And I wouldn't be so worried about being thirty if it weren't for outside things. I guess I could be happy, if bored, with the situation I'm in except with the advent of thirty it has been brought home to me that I don't have forever anymore, especially for certain things. Part of it is jealously and anger with female biology that works out that the prime time for getting training and set up in your career is also the prime time to reproduce. :angry: Men can mess around and find themselves until they hit forty and beyond and not have to worry about that. Not to mention it's perfectly okay for men to be a lot older than their girlfriends/spouse, but not the other way around. Yeah, there's that whole "cougar" thing, but the image is more that they're just messing around and playing. Of course at this point I'm having a hard enough time finding available men my age who are actually mature, let alone substantially younger than I am. But that's a whole other story and probably a demonstration in the dangers of being too cautious about these things (well and the fact that it took me well into college to actually believe anyone could find me attractive, and even now I'm worried about the sanity of anyone who could actually find me all that pretty rather than just not bad with a semi-decent personality).

Now, I'm not one of those people whose primary ambition in life was to be a mother, but I always thought I would like to find someone to be with and to have a few kids at least (being an only child myself I'd like to have more than one child, but for the same reasons I don't think I'd like my own baseball team either, frankly not even my own basketball team). And I just assumed it would happen sooner or later. I'm feeling sort of like Cuddy--although I'm still a bit younger than she is-- except I don't really have anything to show for what I've been up to in the meantime.

And on education when I applied for the grad program I didn't get into I was a lot younger than the average student. I was also young for the program I did get into. In that case I dawdled long enough that by the time I did get my degree--with which even I'm not impressed, but bluffing anyway-- I was about the median age. In the meantime I thought I'd go out and get experience as well as age. Unfortunately due hang ups and allowing myself to get blocked (and now wondering if I've so irrevocably sabotaged my writing without meaning to that'll never be able to get unblocked or achieve anything) I've got the age, but not the skill or experience. This leads me to wonder if I made a mistake--something I absolutely hate to admit under any circumstances-- and I should have done something more practical that would have made me miserable since I'm not exactly having a ball at the moment anyway.

Prpl I am definitely worried about our budding pharmacist. I am pretty pamper and not the most handy or domestic gal around the house, but I learned how to do laundry when I was about ten, for crying out loud. Not that I did it regularly at that age, but I knew how. And I actually do hope it's the latter option that Nomad mentioned for all our sakes, I'm a bit horrified by possibly having a pharmacist that cheated her way through pharmacy school. Fortunately she is probably right that it's going to catch up with her soon.

The thing is with the college adjustment it's not just the taking care of yourself issue though that complicates it. It's simply that it's a whole different world. The thing I loved about university for instance, is the thing that gets a lot of people into trouble, and that is, no one cares if you do your homework or not. I've always hated being nagged and the feeling having someone over my shoulder checking on me all the time, so I like not having the constant busy work and being trusted that I would work out what I needed to do to have things done when they needed to be without too much outside interference--in some classes, we'd check in with the professor on our project or need to turn in a rough draft for evaluation on a certain date, but nothing like the constant "nannying" that happened in high school. Like, I said though the freedom can get some people and they get so caught up in revelling in not being told what to do and slacking off that they wind up at the end of the term with a whole ton of stuff to finish and no earthly way to do so, or having missed so much that there's not hope of pulling up their grades despite how awesome they do on the final.

Or to use the example of my cousin's son, it can be eye opening even if you are a good student and responsible. This kid is very smart and he always got amazing grades in high school, won all kinds of academic awards, didn't even really need to study that much etc. He was pretty much the smartest kid in his school or at least one of the smartest. He decided to study engineering, which is not a cushy major anywhere, then he wound up choosing a school that focuses primarily on engineering topics. Suddenly he gets to school and he's not the smartest one there anymore. Pretty much everyone there is one of the smartest kids in their whole school. Plus things got a lot more instense. All of a sudden he's got to teach himself how to study. Fortunatly he manage to adapt, but it was a real eye opener to him to not be able to skate through anymore. I went through something similar with my grad school program. I won't neccessarily say that I was the best writer even in my high school, let alone in my university, but it still came pretty easy to me. All of sudden welcome to graduate school where everyone else is a fabulous writer too and many have more practical experience in writing than you do. That first quarter or two my ego took a big hit.

Anyway, I'm think pharmacy, actually I'm pretty sure, is another of those subjects that attracts the really smart kids and challenges them. So it's going to be a nasty surprise for her on many fronts.

And finally, Lily, if you figure out why everything has to happen at once please let me know as that's how it works for me too. It's happening tomorrow as a matter of fact for me. There's been an event set up for about a month now that I'm involved with. When it was in the planning stages, not only did I not have anything happening tomorrow, but I didn't have anything going on pretty much for the entire month. In the meantime a call for volunteers to help at a local school that sort of inner city-ish, went out. I wanted to volunteer last year, but then, as now, I was trying to find a job and since a lot of these kids have unstable lives they only wanted people who could commit to the entire year. So I was in the position of having nothing to do, but possibly having to quit when I found a job. Still the same position, but they didn't specifically mention the need for a year-long commitment so I thought I'd ask if that was still the case, I sent an e-mail to some who was marginally involved to ask this. At the same time someone else mentioned that if you'd rather work with older kids the high school (and my Alma Mater, Go Leopards) needed people to work with refugee kids and others who were learning English and about American culture. I sent an e-mail to the person who was talking about this too with the same question. For the younger kids the person I talked to didn't have all the details and told me to ask the person who was actually in charge, but I never got around to it and in fact thought well maybe I don't really want to volunteer for anyting. In the meantime the woman with the other project forwarded my name to the head of that project and then sent me the memo that announced the orientation meeting. This was last week. And when is the orientation meeting? Tomorrow, and it starts half an hour before the other event and lasts two hours. So I had to tell the person in charge of that event that I'll get someone to drop off the food I promised to provide, but I can't physically be there to help. Of course one of the other people helping has a family member who will be having surgery tomorrow and she want to be at the hospital for that. So, it goes to show, I guess, that no good deed goes unpunished. :unsure: :rolleyes:

My friend isn't stupid, she is smart. Just not practical, and very bad at math and science. And maybe she has no confidence, maybe when people tell her no, she'll do the work on her own and realize she does know the stuff. I have no confidence hence why I always aimed low so when I did get that C+ I would be like "Hell yeah!" sometimes I really did fail, and that was bad. College didn't lessen my ego on the smart front infact it helped it. I found college easier to deal with then highschool for academics.It wasn''t so much memorization and spitting back the answers, or the homework having to be done this exact way. It was more of lose set of parameters just prove you know the material. Which I can't memorize things(Unless it's totally useless bit of trivia) and I don't do well with a hyper structured life or tests. Yes I structure my life, but I can't have others do it for me, I feel violated.

I've always been somewhat socially awkard, I tend to be very sarcastic yet very dry at the same time, and that makes people take me seriously.(I guess it's technically not sarcasm because I'm too lazy to ever do the inflection) Then they think I'm a weirdo. And can't see how anyone can have 30-40 friends I have a hard enough time worrying about 5 people. Plus I might have to go out most nights, and I like watching movies and tv alone since people are less likely talk during them.

I like being alone. I know I said I hate being lonely I do, but their's a difference. Being alone is where even though you're sitting at home doing nothing except eating junkfood and watching tv, you do know that if you wanted to you could call someone and go out with them, but chose not to. Being lonely is where you have no one and your only choice is to stay at home. Or surrounded people but feel that you're not really part of the group, you're interacting, but you don't feel like you're actually their, but you are. I can't explain it it's a very trippy feeling. It's like you exist, but at the same time you don't. Everything around you does yet it doesn't at the same time. Yes I feel lonely even when I'm with people, I think it's because I've never found anyone I really connect to. Maybe that person doesn't exist maybe he does who knows.


Or maybe it's the fact that I give off the first impression of being a junky, even though I'm far from it. It's weird even when I'm not doing anything at the time or have done nothing(anything?) in months people are more likely to think that. I guess being apathetic, and quiet must mean I do drugs. I had someone ask if I did black tar heroin from school. What!! I mean I would if it wasn't so addictive and wouldn't get so expensive. So when I'm old and dying I'm trying H and all the other drugs I'm afraid may screw up my future.(except meth or crack never touching those, those scare me, well crackheads and meth heads) People asked me what happens if you die. I replied well I'll be old. I look young for my age, I thought drugs aged you, I would like 30 not 12 sheesh or at least my age. Also the people I've who do do drugs on a regularly basis as in all the time, often are suprised when I've said I've tried somethings, and would probably try them again.

I'm paranoid that my ID is going to be taken away first time I buy alcohol since I look so young. My friends assured me that they can't take away my ID unless they can prove that it's fake. They can't prove anything, because it's real. Maybe I'll take up smoking regularly, I do smoke on occasion, and can smoke a pack in a setting and not getting addicted, nevermind that I smoked for a year straight, because who knows why? I just decided to. Smoking ages you, yeah? I would try meth, but I don't want too look like that. One of my friends finally said "you know one of these days of extreme smoking" (where we smoke a pack in one setting, we do this every few months) we're going to get addicted. Yeah. Don't ask what possessed us too decide to even come up with this game. Yes, we do inhale.

I went to the pool yesterday since our power was out. It's a lap pool at my mom's work and I would have gotten out if the lanes were full and someone came wanting to swim, I swam two laps maybe then just floated staring at the ceiling thinking, and it was the best thing. I was able to work out some things that had been making me neurotic in my head. Some how being surrounded by water helps me think, that or the mountains.

I hear you completely on both the mountains and water for relaxing and working on problems. Sometimes mindless, repetitive tasks, eg. house cleaning or weeding the flowers work too. I also feel you on the alone but not lonely thing. I keep saying I'm perfectly fine being alone most of the time, as long as I know that there's someone I can count on if I need company or help. I should probably be better at reciprocating that than I have been in the past. The thing is I can have been out of regular contact with someone for awhile but if they're really in trouble or need something I'm willing to jump right in, and heaven forbid that someone mess with a person I have deemed one of "mine".

Basically what you liked about college was what I always liked too: it wasn't so much regurgitate this just to prove that you can, but really think about what you've learned and try to understand and use it to some extent-- I mean obviously the real practical value of something like critically analysing themes in a work of fiction doesn't apply in the same way as calculating the stress on a bridge span, but in both cases an assignment goes beyond spit back what I just told you and more into take what I just told you and apply it to something else.

And I guess what I'm getting at is not so much smart or dumb but good or bad at school. They can be the same thing but not neccessarily. A lot of really brilliant people don't do all that great at school,-- consider both Albert Einstein and Thomas Edison, among others, had a lot of trouble with formal education, Einstein even dropped out of school around high school age-- especially in junior high and school because it either doesn't interest them or the way things work just isn't in synch with their style, (in the class I talked about a few posts ago we pretty much learned that while there are at least three different learning styles-- visual, auditory, and kinetic, if you're curious-- whereas the school system is usually just designed to work best for one of them) some people that get the top grades may not score as high in raw intelligence, but they absolutely work their hearts out on everything or they have really good study skills or their learning style is just the kind that works really well with the way the material gets presented. Granted, some of getting along in the world is learning to adapt to conditions that don't completely suit you, but the way things have to be in an academic environment are much more rigid than what you usually run into out in the "real world", more in some professions than others.

It's even sort of wierd that being especially smart can hurt you when the going gets tough, which is what happened with my cousin. If you're the type of person who has to work for the grades you gradually learn how to study and get practice doing it, but if you're the kind of person who's always been able to skate in a lot of areas, it's a big shock when you finally hit something difficult enough to require more effort since you haven't been picking up and practicing study skills as much. In a way it's much like the educated versus intelligent contrast. It's not the same thing, though unfortunately I fear that a lot of people who are in pretty high positions in the world and education may not realize it.

Oddly, I'm like you with structure too. I can't stand to have no plan whatsoever and I even get quite attached to my routine but I start getting annoyed if I feel someone in constraining me in some way even if I would end up doing what they wanted me to do on my own for the most part. And I know I must be terrible to supervise. As I mentioned before, I really dislike having someone hanging over me every minute prodding me and making sure I take exactly ten minutes on my break to the second, no more no less, or worrying that I don't seem to be physically at my desk often enough, but on my own I'm too lenient about deadlines, which is part of why despite how pleasant it sounds I don't think I could be a freelance anything, see also why I don't get much writing done (okay, so I don't feel like sitting down for half an hour tonight, I'll just do a whole hour tomorrow, but then the next day rolls around and oh man, I don't want to do a whole hour, but maybe I'll feel extra creative the next day, and somehow it never gets done the way it should). So, I have to have their wierd mix of mostly hands off but with hard external deadlines. This is probably asking too much in a job, so I guess I'll just have to suck it up. :(

"You have to have a conclusion, you have no thesis." Is something I hate. I know still applies in college. I can't write conclusions, partially because of my belief that their isn't ever a true conclusion in real life. Every part of our lives bleed together, whether it's physical or just mental. Things from your past can always be brought back up in the future. Also I can't give you my opinion on things in three-five pages then say "Done" and never have another thought about it. But I can't tell you the details until I work backwards, or find how what you're asking exactly relates to what we're studying, even more me and what good will this do in my future? I like most subjects as long as the teacher's good. I don't understand stupid busy work that I'm not learning anything from. Don't tell me, Your answer won't satisfy and I like thinking. And the thesis thing I'm always going to suck at. I never give enough information in my thesis. I can write a strong thesis if it's something I'm interested in. I find college easier. I had to read and study in high school, because we had to know facts. But I found that as long as I go to the lectures and take notes I usually have to only glance at the reading. Plus I never remember what I read I either have to write it down, But I can remember films they show in class fairly well. If I write something once I don't have to read it again to remember it most of the time. I also like the whole what is you're opinion on this, and use evidence to prove your point. Instead of who killed this guy on this date. And what was his motive (I'd except what do you think his motive was)(. Also If I like the professor as a person, I'm more likely to remember what I learned.


I've gotten the sudden desire to play Clue-- I think it was that whole who killed who statement above.

I wish that boxes would pack themselves. I also hope my room mates don't suck. I have yet to talk to them.

I always used to hate doing conclusions too, so I'd always get the comment that you wrote a pretty decent discussion of what I assigned or of the problem, but then it just ends. I have to say my problem was not as philosophically rooted as yours though.

You are beyond right in that we should never entirely close our minds on any issue and say aha, I've got that all pinned down, taxidermically preserved and mounted on my wall, metaphorically. You stop thinking, you might as well stop living, or at least not have a brain anymore. Still making a conclusion even in the sense that you're claiming to have wrapped up the problem doesn't mean you can't go back later and rethink if it needs it. I believe both Stephen Hawking and Albert Einstein (both highly intelligent people doing real "breaking edge" stuff) later discovered that initial theories of theirs were false or at least decided that those theories needed reconsideration.

But in writing it's like the old cliche about how to write a paper/essay: 1. Tell 'em what you're going to tell 'em, 2. tell 'em, 3. tell 'em what you just told 'em. It's a little more complex than that, but it does some up what the different parts of a document need to do. I'm sure you know how it goes, but first you make a statement about the topic, like "Shakespeare's Hamlet is an apt illustration of the mindset of a conflicted person". Then go through and say a few ways in which that's what it is, "In it Hamlet shows traits A, B, and C", and a few sentences like that. Then you expand on the statements you made ("the tell 'em" part). Then at the end it's not so much a conclusion as in here's the definitive answer to what I was talking about, but more restating here are the things that I just talked about. Then maybe you use the last sentence to bring up another interesting question for further consideration on your topic or what new questions your temporary answer has caused you to have. I apologize both for going into teacher mode there, I'm afraid it's a reflex :rolleyes: , and for not giving better examples of what I mean, I'm afraid I'm not in the mood to come up with a really well thought out thesis or to dig up an old paper to use. To borrow from, and modify, "old Billy Shakes" (I'm a writer, we get to make up cute nicknames for him, okay) ". . . if this player has offended. . . "

Yes, I totally hear you to on your feelings about the professor having to do with how well you learn. It's something I've noticed as well. It might be a chicken/egg thing in that most of the professors I liked were really good teachers, but I guess I can't definitively say if I liked them because they were good teachers, or I thought they were good teachers because I liked them. I was sort of strange though, the professor I liked the most from undergrad. was one who was universally acknowledged as a good teacher and a pleasant person, but other favorites of mine were ones that when I told people who I was taking a class from, I would get a warning or condolences, and there were some others who everyone except me seemed to think were really great and I just really didn't care for; often they were good teachers in the technical sense, but I just didn't like their style in some way or another. Then, fortunately and fortunately I got out of this habit mostly by college, there were some instructors that bothered me and I'd take my revenge by defying them (I know that makes a lot of sense, "Yeah, I'll totally screw up in your class, that'll show you :huh: ). By college I still did it, but I'd generally wait for ways to prove them wrong, rather than go for open defiance.

Oh, if you ever discover self-packing boxes, please let me know. I'd also be interested in self-organizing bookshelves and self-cleaning desk drawers if you run across any. :D

I will tell you if I find anything of those-as soon as I remember whether or not I'm awake or not and as soon as I'm done being WTF!? and make sure it's not a alien/government conspiracy to take over the world.

100$ to register my car? What the... I mean ok yes we get new liceasense plates this year, but we got new ones in 2000. Plus I know my car works why do I have too prove it, and why $100, I'm sorry but I don't think it's worth $100 to let the officials know that my car does work and can pass inspection. I get why we have to to an extent but i don't get the fee. I don't understand seat belt laws. I understand it's for our safety, but think about it. If you knew you might die in a wreck because you didn't put on a seat belt, wouldn't you consider it? I don't like laws that are to protect me from myself. Most of the time those laws do more harm then good in the long run. I have no real reason to inspect my car since I'm not going to be driving it for the next four years, at the same time when I come home to visit it would be nice to have a car to get around.


Of course their are those times when seat belts do more harm then good, like if your car explodes, or you drive into a lake or a river. I mean if my car is going to explode I'd rather chance my luck with a few broken bones and contusions etc...by being thrown a few yards, instead of being burned alive. Yes their's a high risk of death for both. On a shallower note I don't want to look like a burn victim.