So this is a thread dedicated to all those things you spend way to much time thinking about.

Nothing, what does it look like? what is nothing, if we named nothing which we have it becomes something. If we say it's the absense of matter, particles, etc etc then it's still something because the lack of something is not nothing. Nothing you'd think would be darkness, but darkness is something, and if man was able to truly experience nothing it would automatically become something, so does nothing exist? Can there be nothing? There always has to be something, and nothing shouldn't have a name, but it does. What is nothing composed of? it can't be composed of anything, yet it supposdly exists. How can nothing exist without being composed of anything? Existance of something means it is composed of something whether it's just an idea or a theory, theories, ideas, and imagination are something even if they only are in a few peoples minds.

Schizophrenics create their own world and though often the rules may not conform to the rules in ours that world is real, at least in their minds. Maybe if their was away for Humans to travel to paralell universes we'd be traveling to the minds of Schizophrenics, writers, artists, anyone whose ever created a world in their heads. Maybe we're in some guys head and we think we have free will, but really it's the chemical's in his brain dictating what we do. So maybe we are nothing, but that's not possible because we experience things so we can't be nothing we are something but what are we?

people say space is nothing, but it is something it's the distance between a number of points. It could also be the vaccum around the planets and the stars, but that's still something. I wonder if we went far enough out/up/down in space we'd go through an atomosphere type thing and end up something that looks totally different?

Nothing doesn't exist does it? I mean it's not possible, is it?

My head hurts.

Well, I'd like to say I'm thinking great existential thoughts, and sometimes I do but most of the time is filled with me being a champion worrier, as I mentioned in another thread, but brief sampling as of late:

Why can't I write? (because you never make time to do it, dummy, so of course you've lost the talent and will probably never get it back).

Am I going to wind up completely alone? (probably, but is that a good thing or a bad thing? I'll get back to you)

Boy, I really need to find a job.

Let's see there's that book I need to pick up at the library and read before next Thursday for book club.

Oh, yeah, I was going to go through my old books and donate the ones I don't really want anymore (the problem is I want them all for one reason or another).

Shoot, forgot to brush the cat again (ugh, hairball time, as a matter of fact I believe I hear one being produced right now).

Oh man I was going to reseach <fill in topic> for <fill in person>.

Boy do I miss fencing, but I really shouldn't waste money on it right
now and I'm not feeling ambitious anyway.

At what point exactly did my life become a cross between Cathy, Dilbert,Piled Higher and Deeper, and Ziggy with an ocassional dash of soap opera and perhaps The Farside or Get Fuzzy thrown in?

Wait a sec, did I remember to floss? (I don't care, I'm too tired to get back out of bed anyway)?

Did I take my pill? What will the consequences be if I did and take another one?

I wonder if I need a haircut.

What on earth am I going to wear? And how is it I can have so much clothes and still can't find anything to wear?

Where do I want to go to eat on my birthday? (admittedly this isn't a stressful one, but I really don't know where to go, would like to go somewhere new, but can't think of anywhere that I really want to try, but want to avoid the typical in-the-car-going-out-to-eat dialogue: "where do you want to go?" "I don't know. Where do you want to go?" "Honestly, I don't care. I'll go whever you want to." "I don't know where to go. We'll go where you want to." "I really dont' care, just surprise me", etc. Anyway, it would wind up dumped on me in the end with "It's your birthday, so you choose".)

Why can't the neighbors get their stupid dogs to shut up for five seconds?

This counter feels sticky, I wonder why? (on second thought, check that, I believe I'm better off not knowing).

Why don't they make pudding pops anymore? Those things were so good.

I think I'd like an Otter Pop right now.

Why can't I get the"Colonel Bogey March" aka, as I just found out, "The Comet Song" (Comet, it makes your mouth turn green/ Comet, it tastes like gasoline/ etc.) aka., as I also just found out, thanks Wikipedia "Hitler Has only Got One Ball" (Hitler, has only got one ball/ Goering's are rather small/ etc.) aka that song from Bridget on the River Kwai " out of my head, especially as I'm trying to sleep right now?

I wonder if I met House in real life, would he like me or not?

And that's just a sampling of the lovely dialogue that goes on in my head, usually while I'm trying to sleep.

My worrying is more of what's the point of life? if It's something little like a project or a haircut I'm usually like "I'll deal with that later"

I do worry when people don't like me and if someone is walking behind me I worry that I'm being followed. and Just your general is my phone bugged, does the government read my messages, do I have any information out their that I could get black mailed for? If I ever get surgery will the government plant a chip in my head that writes my thoughts to a computer, would they do that to everyone type paranoia, or is their a sinister type alien invasion being plan. So it's run of the mill type paranoia



My cat died back in January or Febuary and I asked my mom if she knew about the tainted cat food, she said that we didn't buy any of the stuff that had been recalled, so my cat died of natural causes. I think I'd have been even angrier if it had been the pet food that had killed her.She was allergic to everything, we had to buy more expensive cat food because of her poultry allergy, she would lose her hair before we found this out, so she was probably allergic to some ingredient in the recalled food anyways. Also honestly, you probably shouldn't be feeding your dog or cat wheat gluten, their's better stuff to feed them then plant material, considering they are carnivores. This whole situation is reminding me of the doctor who episode "Terror of the Vervoids" which supports my theory that a doctor who episode can be applied to any situation in life.

[/I]Condolences on the kitty. They are so part of the family and anyone who says otherwise is heartless.

For some reason I went with the light hearted approach for the most part on what I think about but believe me, I worry plenty about everything. I'm still obsessing over stupid things I said back in high school (I don't even want to think about how long ago--another source of worry) for pity's sake. The question about how my life became a mix of Cathy, Dilbert et al, is a lighter version of what I really wonder about: exactly when did I lose control or at least when did I become aware of the fact that I had no control to begin with?

I guess I'm more getting at I wish I could get enough of my poor feeble mind together to actually have existential thoughts.

extential thoughts are over rated. Honestly most of them their is no answer for. And if you find an answer it gives you more questions. I wish I was like some of my friends when they do drugs start thinking about these things, instead of me never stop thinking about how the world works/it existence and finding double meanings in everything I see. intentional and unintentional. This is a bad example but it's the only thing I can come up with is my room mate was watching the girls next door. and I noticed the line in the theme song "I'm gonna give you candy" automatically I was like in my head, you know who else uses that phrase? Pedophiles in white vans. And the fact that the news here says "we'll see you at 10" is creepy. I mean they're on the tv they can't see in your living room. I don't think many other people get creeped out by this phrase Relatively innocent phrases can become creepy and terrified if you think about them. Maybe this is why people think I should write horror and sci fi.


Also how hard is it to tell your room mate your having guests over from out of town? I guess it's impossible, I never found that impossible to do. I also don't find putting on a coat to go outside in the winter instead of complaining for a half hour about the cold. I know people say you can't change the weather, but I bet it stays that way to spite the complainers. That's going into a movie/book where some character controls the weather and bases them on people's complaints, but probably not because it might not work.


SHouting, Why do people have to shout when they could call them on the cell if out of ear range. Read: room mate's cousin yelling out the window to a friend on the street (we're on the 7th floor). Or get off their ass and walk over to them.


Also people freaking out when I cross the street and their's a car coming. First off all I made sure it was far enough back I could make it across intime/ had plenty of time to break. Based on myself I would not want to deal with vehicular manslaughter and I'm sure many other's wouldn't want to either. pedestrians are slower then drivers so it takes longer for pedestrians to go the same distance as drivers. If pedestrians were kids with special needs and drivers average and special need kids get extra resources in order to keep up including extra time on tests and papers then. Fuck it! I can't kill a car but a car can kill me, and since the driver is controlling the car will probably spend rest of his life in jail. If I was in his shoes I'd rather be dead then spending the remainder of my life in jail, plus the guilt. Sorry I'm trying to not give you botched reasoning, but on this that's all I have.


Also the year in highschool I made the best grades was my junior year where I was fucked up on some sort of substance everyday which is why I maintain that not thinking=success

this is such a funny thread!! :) People's responses are very funny.

I over analyze just about everything in my life, making it harder than I have to. It quite sucks at times.

But I do think about my life, what it all means, will I end up along (even though I'm 22).

I think about my future, will it be successful? I wonder about the lives of my parents

I wonder if there's someone really like House out there and if they know how much I can connect with them on an emotional level etc. and if they think I'm crazy to think the same way they do (i.e. "everybody lies" and not to trust anyone)

I wonder about global warming

I wonder about ice popsiciles and wonder if they're ever be brought back.

I wonder about jello pudding and cheese and peanut butter and chocolate.

God and peace
Vanessa :)

http://www.tbo.com/life/MGBUFCRF5WE.html?imw=Y

Pretty cool list, that makes you think and gives you hope for the world and humanity.

Interesting list!!! :) I loved number's 39, 35, 41, 42, 37.
God and peace
Vanessa :)

I like the one about the ozone layer and "Super earth" and the one about Saturn. And how blue lights help keep you a wake, I'm going to try that one time to see if it works. I can't remember what else I liked but it was a cool list.

I need to figure out if my essay is due tommorow, I hope not cuz I haven't even started. I've done nothing today and I don't feel bad about it , I'm tempted to not do anything/go anywhere this week. I know I'm the brink of missing to many classes for all of my classes but why can't I be a shut in just for this week? The first three days of doing nothing is hard but after that it becomes suprisingly easy you become so bored your boredom amuses you. Though if I didn't have the internet I'd be bored, but then I would find some game to play or catch up on my reading so that would keep me amused for at least a week with the amount I've been meaning to read. Maybe I'd figure out how to lucid dream on purpose instead of on accident.


I hate school, I don't want to work maybe I'll become some trophy wife, heh.

I may actually have to get off my ass and make money some how this summer. I can't afford a cruise and New York. My mom is willing to pay for the ticket for the cruise, it's just what I do on the cruise is going to be out of my pocket. And the New York Trip will be out of my pocket, as well as DC if that happens; the New York trip wouldn't be so bad if gas wasn't so expensive.

I've been thinking about the VA tech shootings. I've wondered if its my generation, because shootings became big when I was in middle school, and have continued from then on. It may have been earlier; but is my generation really this violent? It doesn't seem right. Yea I get angry, but everyone gets angry but not enough to kill anyone. Is the rest of my life going to be full of violence, I mean I'm not going to be suprised when their's a civil war in the US or even just a revolution. And though it be awful their would be more of a purpose to it then a school shooting.

The crazy thing is someone brought a gun to class at my school last semester, luckily their wasn't a shooting, but think of how easy it would be just to load it. And since it's an art school and we have a lot of final projects someone could say it's part of their project and no one would question it until he/she pulls the trigger.

I wonder if the heart valves that they take from pigs are kosher.

Do you reckon you just started to notice them more, Prpl? Does our/your (tougher gun control laws in Australia) generation have more access to guns?

I think school times should from be later in the morning until later in the afternoon. My school runs from eight until three. Everyone knows teenagers love to sleep in. So start from, say, ten and run until five or so. I haven't got a problem with that; I love to sleep in.

See the problem with the US is despite all the strict laws if someone really wants something it isn't hard to get. So all these people who are trying to tighten control and not tell kids the real dangers are actually hurting the kids more. If they were to tell the kids safety of things and how they worked instead of pretending like they don't exist maybe. Just maybe a lot of the problems in society would go away. Parents not the government, not the state need to teach their kids about safety with dangerous weapons/ drugs/ alcohol/ sex, instead of pretending that kids have no access to anything dangerous. Both of us know despite in TN the law being 21 to own a gun, If I wanted to I could get a gun when I go home for the summer. And laws don't stop everyone, my friend was talking about a girl who wanted a car for her birthday. She commented on how it was stupid that the girl couldn't drive it. I corrected my friend and say she couldn't drive it legally. One of my friends use to steal her before she had a liceseance and would go do stuff, she got really good at parking it exactly how it was before she left. There's always a choice and no matter what laws their are if someone wants something bad enough they will find a way. If it weren't for my explaining sex so well I'd still be clueless, because we don't really have sex ed over here. I do think that maybe a parent's job as kids are ready for that at different times, but at the same time the school shouldn't teach abstienence. The mentality of the average teen is I'm going to do the opposite of what they say. I don't mean use reverse psychology on them, I mean give them facts and statistics, but try not to be biased. Yes some kids are still going to get into trouble, but maybe some of them will pay attention.


I Could just have been noticing them more, I am relatively young just begun college.

I don't know AE, but I am older than both you and Prpl and I've got to say that, yes, it does seem as if these incidents happen more often than they used to. I can remember there were ocassional incidences of people going on shooting rampages. I recall there was a man who walked into a MacDonald's and started shooting when I was around 11 years old and prior to that there was the incident of a student in Texas who was shooting at people from the top of a water tower, and the incident referenced by the song "I Don't Like Mondays", which House played part of in "Halfwit"-- the title for those who don't know is the shooter's answer to why she did it when asked initially.

I can't say I know why it's become more common other than the copycat factor. As Prpl said, it's not difficult for the most part to get a hold of a gun--or anything-- illegally here. From what I understand Britain, Australia and the rest of the Commonwealth have much lower gun crime rates than we do. On the other hand I don't know that changing our laws to resemble those would help at least for a generation or two.

Some people will claim that the violence has to do with increased violence in the media (TV, movies, video games etc.) but I don't know that that's the whole answer. FPS games are not my favorite genre, but I do enjoy the ocasional round of "fragging" every now and then, yet I know that blowing away a pixellated character on the computer screen is far from doing something similar to a live person. The same with movies, I don't go in for the ultra-violent stuff, but again, I know there's a huge difference between what happens in the movies or on TV and in real life. Just because Mad Max, say, goes on a rampage to protect his and his family's honor, does not mean that it's a good idea for me to do the same in real life no matter what provocation may come. When I fenced one night my fencing buddies and I had a conversation that somehow got around to whether we'd be able to kill someone or not. I said that I wouldn't and someone protested that they thought I might be able to because I do get very competitive when immersed in a bout. The thing is, and maybe I'm unusual in that I can compartmentalize like that, I know that if I stab/slash you on strip--fifteen times even-- after the bout's over we shake hands, no one's seriously injured (barring accident), and we both go off to complain about our jobs or significant others with no damage done. Not so in real life and that's a big difference. Anyway, while seeing violence may make a difference there's got to be an underlying problem involved as far as I'm concerned for someone to decide that the faked violence they see should be carried out in real life. Of course this doesn't hold for little kids who are still working out the whole real/imaginary boundary, but for anyone over those ages, it seems right.

Now what worries me is the fallout from all this. This guy wrote a lot of disturbing stuff. Of course since I haven't read any of it I can't say if it's violent beyond the level of something that a more psychologically healthy person would write, and this guy was clearly demonstrating some other signs that all was not well. Still I worry that we'll have a backlash against anyone who writes anything violent. I am a non-violent person, but I have written a play that deals with domestic violence where a character gets shot, and bleeds copiously, on stage. I have other frightening scenarios running around in my head, and I have to say from my reading and rudimentary anatomical knowledge, I could theoretically hurt someone pretty badly if I wanted to, but the crux is I don't want to. Just because I can imagine a frightening scenario or have a violent character do something really horrible to another character does not mean that I want to, would ever consider, or even could do something like it in real life. So, I worry that anyone who writes a story where violence occurs will get sent to see the psychologist or suspended from school or something like that.

The other big thing is people on both sides of the gun rights issue are getting riled up. I fall mostly into the anti-gun side of things. I believe I will remain there. I do know of incidents where someone with a concealed weapon headed off a situation that could have been much worse (in the local shooting I was talking about the gunman probably did less damage because there was an off duty police officer out having dinner with his wife, who had a gun with him who engaged the shooter until the police arrived and who helped them contain him when they did arrive) the thing is in many of these situations that person was on off duty law enforcement officer or someone who had training in dealing with a violent person. Someone called into a news program and said that lay people could easily be trained to act responsibly in the same situation. I do agree somewhat. There are laypeople who I would probably trust to behave reasonably and properly in a bad situation, but there are quite a few people who are going to decide to play cowboy/Rambo and I don't know that I'm comfortable with a whole herd of that type going around exchanging fire and possibly causing more damage than good. One of the primary rules they teach you in First Aid classes is to be careful to make sure that the scene is safe so you don't end up creating more casualties or become one yourself e.g. if there's a car accident make sure that the cars are turned off if you can and that you won't get run over yourself while trying to help. I'm not sure having a whole bunch of people independently shooting is going to make the situation safer. The off duty police officer was even mistaken by some for a second gunman, but fortunately when his wife called to report the incident she also informed them that her husband was an off-duty office who had his gun with him who was going to try to stop the gunman if he could and told them what he was wearing so that he wouldn't be mistaken for suspect and possibly shot (he also loudly announced that he was an officer when he saw the police team coming). On the other hand guns were outlawed on the Virginia Tech campus and this happened anyway.

One of the interesting/sad things is that one of the professors who were shot had survived the Holocaust and Czechoslovakia under Soviet rule, but then died trying to hold the door to his classroom shut to protect his students (they all jumped out the windows, the last one looked back, saw the professor still lying against the door trying to keep it shut, hesitated and then jumped). At least all several students took the time to e-mail his family who are apparently in Israel to let them know he died a hero. It makes me wonder what I'd do. I'm really fond of being alive, as we all are, but I know were I teach a class I would feel a huge attachment to and a duty to protect my students. Since I know First Aid, although I'm no longer officially certified--and I need to look into doing that again-- I also wonder if/how I would cope with injured people. Obviously having some knowledge I dont' think I could just sit there and not try to help, but yikes, what an intense situation.

Once again, Catlady responds to herself, but I also wanted to mention the circle my thoughts are going in lately. I am still not in the greatest mood and apparently all I can do is wait it out because I am at a loss to figure out how to cheer myself up at the moment, and it's probably partially hormonal anyway-- when someone in last night's episode mentioned something about hormones screwing up the POTW's body I remarked "Isn't that what they generally do anyway". I seem to have a history of taking threads and hijacking them from my whining pleasure, so I'll to refrain from saying much more besides the angst I outlined in my first post on the "I Need a Vacation Thread" and saying that the bad health luck of those around me continues, but here's how it goes:

I'm really depressed and feeling tired mentally, I'm really sick of feeling this way==> how can you be such a downer when you have much better than a ton of other people (insert thoughts of all those angst inducing situations I've mentioned happening to those around me)==> you, know Catlady, you really are a selfish, horrible person to feel like you have it so bad== > you're right, I am a bad person, that's really depressing==> man, I'm so depressed and mentally tired. I'm really sick of feeling this way==> etc. rinse, repeat indefinitely.

This isn't a thought it's more of a rant

I hate life I hate it I hate it I hate it. People always are saying o next phase of your life will be better? Fucking liars. I'm invisible damnit and that's how I'll always be I'm ugly worthless, hated by so many people. My room mate proved I'm worthless by leaving a note instead of talking to me. My head hurts I haven't had a good night sleep since at least last thursday and I'm about ready to throw the fucking tv out the window I can only watch stupid shows so many times. I'm trying to save money so I've quit drinking and it sucks. I wouldn't feel this way if I wasn't trying to save money. I have a little bit of vodka left, but I was saving that fuck it. I won't get drunk but I'll feel better. Saving money sucks!

I know the feeling believe me. I'm beginning to think that my life actually peaked sometime around the time I became toilet trained and it's been going downhill since. Still, sleep is good--advice I need to heed myself-- get some and things may become more bearable.

I'm sorry to hear about your on-going roommate woes. I do have to say something about your roommate leaving you note rather than talking directly to you. I don't know her, obviously, so I can't say for sure, but often I'll write a note to someone if there's a tense issue because first, I'm better in writing than I am in person and second, writing a note allows me to edit a little so that I can be sure I'm getting across what I really mean to say. And it gives me time to analyze my thoughts and perhaps get to the crux of the issue.

On the other hand though I do feel your pain. One of the things that annoys me more than little else in the world is hearing that I've done something wrong or someone's felt insulted by something I've said from a third party. As much as I may not react in the best way initially, I really appreciate having someone who has an issue with me to just come to me and tell me what's up. I admit I can get loud and I do yell, loudly at times. I can perseverate on an issue like no other, but I'm pretty much all bark and no bite, though I realize that may be a surprise to people who don't know me well. Still--while I like to believe I'm really "bad", I've been told, much to my chagrin that I'm really not all that scary-- chances are after I process things I will be perfectly willing to either explain what I really meant--ocasionally, yes, I really did mean to offend you-- or to find some way to correct my mistake. I would have the courtesy to do that with someone who I feel wronged by and I sort of expect the same respect from others.

Yet, again, a note could be a good thing. At least you have concrete proof of who said what.

Of course a good cry can't hurt either, although, I'm fighting it because all it will do is make the current mayhem being wrecked by my allergies worse and I am definitely not pretty when I've been crying. Let's hope both of us get some sleep and feel better soon.

She claimed she never had a chance to talk to me, and we were in the same room for an hour. She's also one of those people who would show everyone what I said, making me the bad guy. There was no big issue. She claims to be tough, but I know as soon as someone confronts her she'll be pissing herself.


I got some sleep and actually feel better.

so do you think it's a sign of needing glasses, vacation, or a brain when you get a pamphlet from a jehova's witness but when you were getting it you though it was a recipe having to do with tomatoes because you mistook the picture of the globe for a tomato?


My hands were full and I had just gotten out of the grocery store and was walking home. It seemed logical that some cook book promoter would be standing outside a grocery store handing out recipes, right? I was hungry. Though can't explain how I thought a blue and green globe was a red tomato.

Thinks it's a ploy from some higher power why we can't remember what it was like our last stage of life? I mean we think we do but we don't I can't remember what I thought as a teenager, or what teenagers think of. My whole memory of me in the past is scewed by my present memory. So do you think it's a ploy so none of the generations get along? and we actually achieve peace?


Also does anyone employ miniture characters from shows in their head, to read stuff? Well they aren't reading you're reading but it's like the character is performing the book, very entertaining actually. I mean not really employ, but everything you read, you read it like you picture them saying it?

I remember what it was like to be a kid. How I thought as a kid. What a knob I was, sometimes. Of course this memory, these experiences, are filtered through my memory now, which is always subjective and plastic and contained within the present.
But I still remember.

If peace was attainable I think we'd have a better definition than something like 'the absence of war'. I like peace as much as the next person. But there's a huge line between wanting and asking for peace and achieving it. What the hell is world peace anyway?

I doubt the true concept of world peace exists. by world peace I mean people have freedom and are happy. I'm not talking a utopia by using eugenics and brainwashing the population, that's not fair. Yes the population would not know what they were missing, but what's the point in life if you can't discover the world, share opinions, think, discuss, and most of all ask questions. I know people out their don't do any of this, but I want to be like, "Look!" point out the one thing that contradicts their beliefs. How hard is it to notice things? My mom and I went to Gino's East friday night for dinner, this lady asked where the restroom was. And the hostess said down the hall to the left and she did, and their was no restroom. There was a sign saying bathroom upstairs, now the hostess could have said up the stairs, down the hall and to the left. The lady could have also read the sign. I don't think the people don't notice things are stupid, I just don't think they pay attention.


I think I know what I felt and thought as a child, but I'm not sure because of the filter.