I've been posting a new story up on FF.net. It's my first attempt at a longer House work (I wrote several lengthy XF fanfics back in the day). It's rather stream of consciousness (It's how I write) and unedited. Once it's complete, I'll go back and spiff up the writing, but I hope you'll enjoy it for what it is. I'm up to chapter 20 at this point.

The fanfic is a follow up to the story The Bargain. It is T-rated; with one or two chapters closely approaching "R". It is really a House/Cuddy story, with some (rather annoying) Wilson and a little bit from the rest of the team.

The link is: floating

Any feedback is welcome and will be listened to ;)

Sorry for the non-reply, but I love this stuff, and I'll take a look at this story as soon as I can. Fanfiction.net is blocked by the firewall where I am at the moment.

I follow the 'make a mess, then clean it up' process when I write quite a bit too.

Cheers.

Well. Me likey.

And I hope you don't mind a huge comment-spam, because I've got a few. Brace yourself. ;)

This is by far the most realistic post Season Two fic I've read that deals with the Ketamine problem. Exploring House with no cane is very well and good, exploring House with no leg problem at all doesn't really gel with everything we've learned from the show.

I can see that it's unedited, but in no way am I implying that the story is hard to read. It flows well and you haven't made any huge errors (like I usually do when I post something before editing it: along the lines of leaving some waylaid character or story line stranded in a vast sea of writing).

I love that this story describes an arc - we have the build-up, the cure, euphoric healed high, and the inevitable crash. Very Housian.
In terms of this, the first couple of chapters seemed almost to be a 'warm-up'. In my opinion, the later chapters are better reading (not that the earlier ones were bad). In particular I really liked chapters 18, 19 and 20. They dealt with change (not like the earler chapters that dealed with adjustment, if you can understand that), yet in a different way. Maybe it was Cuddy.
I felt the climax of the story (I read it in one go) when Cuddy went in and found House in the bathroom. Very good.

I do have a comment on the characters: This is very heavily biased towards Cuddy and House. By all means explore their relationship (I like House/Cuddy, so don't think I'm bagging your pairing), but it may be slightly OOC to bash the other characters.
Wilson especially seems a little bit off in this... More of a meddling fool than a doctor. There's obviously a dynamic involved between Wilson, House, and Cuddy concerning the pain, and I wouldn't blame all of the ignoring and non-prescribing on one of the characters involved in that dynamic.


I totally didn't see it coming that he was dreaming about his parents visiting and everything else. Ok, it seemed a bit suss, but I thought that was just House and his after-ketamine glow, not a hallucination.

I like this.

Cameron hovers with the best of them, to be sure.

That paragraph is great. House does have an element of Faust in him – learned gentleman in search of information or knowledge summons the devil (a Bad Thing), sells his soul. Very dark, very metaphorical. It fits in with what House says here, and with No Reason itself to a certain extent.

Two really pedantic points:
How come House hallucinates (love the undercurrent of hallucination, by the way) about his parents, but there is no mention of them after that? I think if I got shot and hallucinated about someone I'd at least give them a call even if I hated their guts/vice versa. Except if they shot me.
Would Cuddy give House an injection like that on the bed?

All in all I really liked this. Sorry if I sound picky - I really liked what you did with No Reason and House/Cuddy, and like this story.

P.S. You capitalise hell, and it makes me smile every time I see it. I don't know why. Not bagging you out, I think it's cute. I find strange things funny.

Well, I screwed up the tags on this, and I can't seem to fix them, so...


[Armchair Elvis,Aug 14 2006, 06:03 AM]
Well. Me likey.

And I hope you don't mind a huge comment-spam, because I've got a few. Brace yourself. wink.gif[/quote]

Cool. This is the longest commentary on my story. I love it and appreciate the feedback.

[quote]This is by far the most realistic post Season Two fic I've read that deals with the Ketamine problem. Exploring House with no cane is very well and good, exploring House with no leg problem at all doesn't really gel with everything we've learned from the show.[/quote]
I've read a few of those, and it is what drove me to write this.


[quote]I love that this story describes an arc - we have the build-up, the cure, euphoric healed high, and the inevitable crash. Very Housian.[/quote]

Again, what I was really going for from the start. I believe that House wants so badly to change, but finds himself trapped in a cage. His hyperactivenss in the series is his pacing that cage. Not that he wouldn't have been restless before, but his leg has made him a trapped animal. The release that ketamine would bring, I believe would create euphoria, but the crash would be that much harder if it all goes to hell.

I[quote\n terms of this, the first couple of chapters seemed almost to be a 'warm-up'. In my opinion, the later chapters are better reading (not that the earlier ones were bad). In particular I really liked chapters 18, 19 and 20. They dealt with change (not like the earler chapters that dealed with adjustment, if you can understand that), yet in a different way. Maybe it was Cuddy.[/quote]

You know, it's funny. I re-read the entire thing on Saturday and felt the same way. When I go and do the re-write, I'm going to rework those first few chapters to give them more movement and rhythm.

[quote]
I do have a comment on the characters: This is very heavily biased towards Cuddy and House. By all means explore their relationship (I like House/Cuddy, so don't think I'm bagging your pairing), but it may be slightly OOC to bash the other characters. [/quote]

It wasn't my intention to bash. I'm just very annoyed with Wilson as he was portrayed in the last few episodes. He has blinders on regarding House's pain. He really does believe it's all in his head. Even in Who's Your Daddy, he put two and two together with the pain and attributed it to the relationship with the old friend. We, the veiwers know that's not true. House's uptick in pain had been pre-potw. Wilson's mantra regarding House is: You like to be miserable, therefore you are. If you change, you won't be you. So, that's where a lot of my bias about Wilson comes from. But, I think he's also a bit edgy about House's crash when (or if) the procedure fails. He does not believe that House can handle more disappointment like that. He felt that way about Grace, too. So that's where the other part of Wilson's attitude comes from. Maybe I wasn't as heavy on that part as I might have been. When I do the edit, maybe I'll factor Wilson in more and make more explicit his more virtuous reasons for not wanting House to go through this.

[quote]Wilson especially seems a little bit off in this... More of a meddling fool than a doctor. There's obviously a dynamic involved between Wilson, House, and Cuddy concerning the pain, and I wouldn't blame all of the ignoring and non-prescribing on one of the characters involved in that dynamic. [/unquote]

I actually don't (at least I hope not). A lot of the angst over blame is covered in The Bargain, which was sort of the prequel to Floating. I wrote it just after No Reason aired. It might be appropriate to fuse the two stories (since The Bargain is a one-shot). I haven't read it in awhile, but I think I explain a lot about why Cuddy is doing this and not Wilson. I will try to redeem Wilson by the end or in the re-write, so point taken.

I haven't included much of the team, because so much of what's happening with House, he would conceal from his juniors. He doesn't want their hovering, nor pity, nor foreman's glaring.


I totally didn't see it coming that he was dreaming about his parents visiting and everything else. Ok, it seemed a bit suss, but I thought that was just House and his after-ketamine glow, not a hallucination.


[QUOTE]“No. I mean, how’s he doing. You know, the shooting. It must have been traumatic for him. Has he talked about it at all?” Great, thought Cuddy. All House needs is to have her hovering. Cuddy sighed.[/QUOTE]
Cameron hovers with the best of them, to be sure.[/quote]

LOL


[quote]Two really pedantic points:
How come House hallucinates (love the undercurrent of hallucination, by the way) about his parents, but there is no mention of them after that? I think if I got shot and hallucinated about someone I'd at least give them a call even if I hated their guts/vice versa. Except if they shot me.
[/quote]

My sense is that all of that happened in the couple of weeks that form the gap in the story. The time during which House is feeling great, everything is working. The real euphoric time...I leave that as a gap, since that was less interesting to me (for this story) than all of the angstiness (which is what I live for)
[quote]
{Would Cuddy give House an injection like that on the bed? [/quote]

This was a specific choice I made. I figure that the easiest way to give an injection like that is curled on your side (like with an LP). That position exposes the vertabrae in high relief, so you know where you're sticking the needle and it doesn't go where it's not supposed to go. If it's medically wrong (which I don't know, desite my efforts to find out), I will absolutely alter the scenario!

[quote]All in all I really liked this. Sorry if I sound picky - I really liked what you did with No Reason and House/Cuddy, and like this story.[/quote]

I glad you liked it (it's not quite finished), so keep reading.

[quote]P.S. You capitalise hell, and it makes me smile every time I see it. I don't know why. Not bagging you out, I think it's cute. I find strange things funny.[/quote]

completely unconcsious choice. I think I capitalize it once and not the other time I used the word. LOL, so go figure.

Again, thanks for the thoughtful commentary. It's appreciated! [/QUOTE]
Cool. This is the longest commentary on my story. I love it and appreciate the feedback[QUOTE][/QUOTE][QUOTE][Armchair Elvis,Aug 14 2006, 06:03 AM][/QUOTE]

sasmom - this is awesome. House/Cuddy isn't my usuaal bag but this is so damn well written and makes me love it more so. Sorry this isn't more constructive but I'm catching up. Great job and cheers! :) :)

Thanks, Benj. Always love feedback (short or long ;) )

I've just completed it! Phew. Now for the rewriting phase (just a little tweaking and fixing errors)

I think this is wonderful. I loved the hopefilled ending and the brilliant device of the book authored by House which reveals so much of his backstory and the tragic effects of the infarction I have left comments on ffnet. Your latest 'Liberation' came through as an alert a couple of minutes ago ... wow. Congratulations on both and thank you.