Most of you probably don't know this, but at the pizza place I work at I've worked with a bunch of weirdos, some of which are still there and some of which aren't. This is a different pizza place then the one with the mexican gang bangers.

For example the guy who hired me was this gun nut who always was shining his gold plated hand gun. One time when I was closing I made a noise and he come out of his office waving his his gun in the air saying "What's that? I thought I heard a noise?" awhile back he got fired for feeling up some guys butt. Another odd person who works there is this guy who looks , acts and sounds like peewee hermin. Sometimes after hours he'll dance around singing with his fly open. I remember last year he tried to show me his wang for some reason, but I didn't want to see it so that shall forever remain something I didn't see thankfully.

Alot of weirdos also come there to eat, theres this one guy who regresses into a little kid when he gets drunk and theres also a really chubby woman who sometimes hits herself when she gets drunk and never wants to leave.

But this isn't about them, this is about some new guy who came to work there recently. To be honest I hate the guy, he keeps on talking about stupid stuff (I cant remember what because whenever I don't have to work with him, I block out most of what he says from my memory) and he keeps on trying to feel me up for some reason, but he never succeeds because of my mad avoidence skills. Also for some reason sometimes this guy will eat the old garbage pizza which is mixining witht he other garbage right out of the bus tub. Sort of like that guy from the chickenfoot episode of invader zim who was eating out of the bus tub.

Anyway today I decided to play a prank on him, it was awsome because it was just like in the bugs bunny cartoons. I found a can of pepsi and began to shake it it up but not so much that it would explode. Anyway he notices me doing this and asks me why. So I say that I was seeing if the pepsi can would blow up if I shook it enough, but then I pretended to give up when it didn't blow up. I knew he was pretty impulsive guy and would take the bate, as soon as I put it down he started slamming it against the wall I just sort of edged away from him while he was doing this and the can blew up soaking him. I started laughing at him and he said "It's not funny I'm soaking wet!" but that was why it was funny. Of course after this he just kept on trying to harass my sexuality much to my annoyance, man I want to beat the crap out of him so bad sometimes!

Fortunately, it looks like I may be able to quite this job next week so here's hoping things go according to plan.

You realise there's material there for three sexual harassment lawsuits? I mean seriously. One against peewee,one against douchebag and a final one against the company.

Actually I have been toying around with the idea of bringing a hidden a tape recorder with me to tape some of the stuff he says, that way if I did sue him I would easily win. The only problem is that I'm probably going to quite in a week so I wouldn't have very many opportunities to carry out my plan.

And the fact that hidden recordings are inadmissable as evidence. Now security footage from the workplace on the other hand is perfectly kosher

Didn't know that, awe well those hidden tape recorders are all pretty expensive anyway.

Lawsuits aside for one moment I think this little insight into your world explains a lot about you. That and I'm astounded at your patience with these people, even by my standards.

I don't care about most of the other weirdos that show up there, because aside from that thing that happened with peewee last year most of them don't do things that directly effect me.

But this new guys going to pay, oh yes, before I leave he's going down.

Why don't you just go bang, zoom, send them off to the third moon of omacron perseia 8?


Or maybe just slap them with a trout.

Trout slappings are nature's way of saying 'get the hell of my lawn'

Or "get the hell out my body of fresh water" you know since they're fish, and fresh water fish, mostly.

Actually I do do that when he gets too close, except for the part with the fish because we don't have fish there, I did hit him with a wad of pizza dough one time though.