Name

Short songfic by WhiteAndie

All rights reserved
Song by Goo Goo dolls not mine
I do not own Elijah ... so sad! but true!



And even though the moment passed me by
I still can't turn away

New York, a big city with lots of different people, different minds, different lives, and I’m here, lost in the middle of this big God mess, lost in the world, like a normal person, like a normal boy in the subway. I see a lot of faces, lot of smiles and frowns, but then, I see here, standing there, in silent, with her mysterious smile and her curious eyes. She is not looking at me, she is looking at the world, at the little kid in front of here who smiles her back. She is looking into the world, into the souls. Then she turns and see me. She smiles, and I smiled her back.

'Cause all the dreams you never thought you'd lose
Got tossed along the way

But she doesn’t move, she stays there, still watching the world, maybe wondering how everything is working, maybe lost in her thoughts, maybe thinking of me, of who I am, I don’t care who I am, I care who she is. Who is that girl? That dark haired girl, and beautiful honey eyes, her red lips and her pale skin. Who is she? Why is she smiling? With her smile like the sun and her teeth like the stars, shining and clear. Why is she here? Is she her e because of my destiny? She is in the same wagon than me, because the life wanted me to see her? To stay amazed by her?

And letters that you never meant to send
Get lost or thrown away

Should I go and talk to her? Maybe I’d broke the spell that comes out from her body and her soul. Maybe if I talk to her she would vanishes in the air like a faerie tale, like the dreams you want to keep dreaming but they disappear and you only have the memory of them. The memory back in your head, repeating once and another and another, like a broken disc.

And now we're grown up orphans
That never knew their names
We don't belong to no one
That's a shame

What is her name? it’s a name to explain her person? Does she have one? Name, what is a name but a group of letters that explain your person in this giant world, full of different people and lives. Words, names, things, people, all connected and I just found it out because of her. Who is she? What is she waiting for? Why she can’t stop smiling with that gracious smile and beautiful eyes?

But if you could hide beside me
Maybe for a while
And I won't tell no one your name
And I won't tell 'em your name

Where is she from? Does she come from a place? Do I know where is? Girl, your eyes, clear and brown as the fall, and deep and mysterious as the ocean, like a big chocolate pool, those are your eyes, and now, I became poetic, all because of you. Who you are my sweet stranger? How could you come here and change my mind? Embracing me in this sweet dream of you?

Scars are souvenirs you never lose
The past is never far

Does she have a life? Does she have a partner? IS she alone in the world? As I am right now? IS she expecting someone to come and save her? ‘cause I am, and She is the only and the first one who made me realize that I need someone. That I need an arm to embrace me and protect me. She seems so strong, so powerful, my legs are shaking with hereyes, only with hereyes, only with her glance.

Did you lose yourself somewhere out there?
Did you get to be a star?

What is she thinking about? On where are her thoughts lost? Maybe she is thinking about space, or about her past, or her present, or her future. Maybe she is thinking about me, wondering who I am, the same way I’m wondering and making and creating a life for her; a life where I’m into, where she got me into.

And don't it make you sad to know that life
Is more than who we are

But she is more than that. She is more than a thought, more than a breathe, more than a life. She is herself. She is a living creature, breathing as magically as I could even think about. I can’t believe even if the same air I breathe is hers too. She seems to be lost in another world, looking outside, lost in her own world, in her fantasies, so near me, yet so untouchable, so far away, so out of my reach. How does she do that?

You grew up way too fast
And now there's nothing to believe
And reruns all become our history

The car stops and she looks around, and smiles. She is ready to go, this her stop. She smiled me back and looks outside, to the real world: ready to get lost in that sea of people, with her lives, thoughts and smiles and frowns. She’ll be lost there, and I’d never find her again.

A tired song keeps playing on a tired radio
And I won't tell no one your name
And I won't tell 'em your name
I won't tell 'em your name

I tried to move where she was but the sea of people stops me, I can’t move and she is getting lost in the sea, walking so calmly, like floating, like a feather, like an angel. I watched her from the window, wanting to go for her, to reach her and ask her for her name. what is her name? I lost her without her name.

I won't tell 'em your name...


I go back to my seat and I look outside, outside is dark and I imagine, cold, very cold. But I wish I could be outside. I can’t think in anything more but her name. what is her name? where I can find her? I want to find her, will I be able? If I find her, I would ask for her name, and I will keep it in my memory like a sweet memorandum of the day a single girl changed my life point of view, the day I stopped being Elijah and became into another person in the world.

I think about you all the time
But I don't need the same
It's lonely where you are come back down
And I won't tell 'em your name