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Title: Snow-Globe
Description: new poem


Laila - June 22, 2006 03:57 PM (GMT)
Snow-globe

Under the cheese-cover of blue in blue
freedom feels like an empty promise.

Almost cloudless,
sprinkled with scars
by planes, callously cutting the sky -
the heavens stretch before my eyes.

The sky is the limit
and I see nothing but sky!
Blue surrounding me
like the glass-globe
surrounds the Eiffel-tower,
- shakeable and scattering snow.
It's vertex stagnant, eternally
millimetres short
of scraping its prison.

And I wonder how colossal
a world I need to feel free in.



© Laila Balke



Not quite sure what to think of it, but it's my latest poem :)
Criticism is appreciated! :love:

Mena - June 23, 2006 01:24 PM (GMT)
Criticism? What kind of criticism can be mustered, when it come sto your poetry? Compliments I can handle, but that's it.

You have a way to conjure words and images that is stunning... I was reading, and the screen of the computer dissolved before my eyes to tun into a blue, sphere-like sky, cold and pure, and for an instant I felt so small under it.

That's the feeling i have inside, and you see, that's all i can express.

:bow:

tasha - June 27, 2006 10:42 PM (GMT)
Oh wow, so extremely beautiful. I had to phone my friend and read it to him, immediately. Its so gorgeous. We love it. :)

Thank you so much for sharing. I really enjoyed being in such a beautiful place, if only for a moment, and if only in my head.

Laila - July 2, 2006 10:38 AM (GMT)
Aww thank you guys so much...
I realy wasn't sure about this one, feels so - unsmooth. I can't explain.
But your words mean the world to me, thank you so much!

hugs
Laila

tasha - July 4, 2006 12:54 AM (GMT)
:) *hugs* Keep writing!




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