Hello lovelys,

I was rumaging through my old computer files while grumbling about lack of inspiration when, hazah! I can across these three stories tucked away in a file called "hammock." Now, I know what you must be thinking; "What the heck is her deal with hammocks *cough* freak *cough*" Hehe, but basically what I have are three stories that all are set on or near hammocks, lol. Basically the hammocks' aren't super important, but I happened to have a thing for hammocks in high school, lol.

Anyway, I thought, heck, I might as well post these and demonstrate to ya'll (*cough*) what my writing was like a bit ago (the first one I wrote right before my sophomore year, about 3 1/2 years ago). And hey *shrugs* I kind of like them, so why not? :)

So, here's the first of them, I hope you like!

Tchao!

(ps. I'll probably put some notes at the top of each, explaining when I wrote them, and who the characters are based on/suppose to be, etc)

(Alright then, this is the first of the three, written right before my sophomore year. Which happened to be right after when the first Princess Diaries movie came out, so, of course, I was madly in love with Michael (played by Robert Schwartzman/Carmine, lead singer of Rooney). So, that's who Michael's supposed to be. And Christine was the "character name" that I went by back then, so she's me, more or less (of course lol), or rather, her mannerisms are similar to how mine were back then. Oh yes, and the title has nothing to do with the fic, I just happened to by listening to that song (by Santana) at the time I was titling it lol. So, I hope you enjoy!)

~Maria, Maria~

Christine lay in her bed staring at the ceiling. It was around 1:30 am, as she could see from the neon red numbers radiating from her alarm clock next to her bed. As 'Jimmy Eat World's' My Sundown faded out on her stereo, Christine lay still for a while listening to the silence of her house. The only sound was that of her ceiling fan, which rocked back and forth (since she never had managed to figure out how to slow the speed of it's rotations), and her CD player sliding to a stop. Shimmering white rays of moonlight seeped in from outside her tightly closed curtains, and the plastic stars she had randomly glued to her ceiling were already beginning to fade out of sight.

She shivered as her fan blew a breeze over her and propped herself up on her hands. Sliding out from under her soft down comforter, she paused to smooth out her bed sheets and blanket before placing the comforter carefully back over her bed. As she made her way to her closet, Christine pulled her shoulder-length, strawberry-blond hair up into a ponytail using a baby blue scrunchie she had grabbed out of the drawer under the table that held her clock. She pulled her pale yellow sweatshirt over the blue and white stripped tank top and baby blue cotton shorts which she usually wore to sleep in on warm summer nights.

Christine then popped open the CD compartment of her radio and picked up the CD, careful not to chip her freshly polished French-tipped nails, and slid out of her room, CD in hand. As she made her way through her dark house, Christine ran smack into the arm of her fathers hideously over-stuffed, green couch. Christine's mother was infamous for her habit of rearrange the furniture without telling anyone. So it wasn't unusual to be 'attacked' by a piece of furniture if one were to get a glass of water or for any other reason be moving about the house at night. Christine rubbed her sore hip with the palm of her hand as she slid open the back door and walked out onto the porch into the warm July night. She carefully set down the CD on her rope hammock and stepped back inside for her mother's CD player. Christine closed the sliding glass door behind her and plugged the stereo into an rusty outside outlet. She popped open the CD compartment and set her CD inside before slumping into her hammock and pulling a blanket over her feet. When she stretched over to turn on the CD the hammock swung back and hit the sliding glass door. Christine let out a little shriek and a fit of muffled giggles as she buried her face in a pillow until the hammock stopped swinging violently back-and-forth. Then she pressed 'play' and closed her eyes, concentrating fully on the music.

The music absorbed all of her attention, enveloping her every thought and flowing through her bloodstream, reminding her why she loved it so much. Christine was so absorbed in thought, that she didn't even notice someone jump over the fence on the side of her yard. So when she felt someone sit down next to her in the hammock and lay their palm on her shoulder, she nearly screamed. When she realized who it was she clamped her jaw shut, biting the tip of her tongue.

Michael let go of her and fell off the hammock in surprise.

"Sorry! Sorry!" he whispered, "I didn't mean to scare you!"

Christine started laughing and slapped her hand over her mouth to muffle the noise. The last thing she needed was to wake up her parents.

"I- I'm sorry. I heard your CD playing back here so I thought... I dunno..." Michael stumbled to his feet and stuffed his hands in his pockets. He stared at his feet and shuffled them around like a nervous school boy.

"Hahahahaha...," Christine stiffled her laughter as she gestured for him to sit down, "It's fine. I just wasn't expecting you to come here today. I thought things were getting better."

Michael sat down in the hammock. "Well, they're not..." he pulled his knees to his chest.

Christine couldn't help but start giggling again as a thought ran through her mind, "Can-you-imagine-what-my-parents-would-have-thought?" she gasped between giggles, "If they'd woken up and seen you...?"

Michael looked at her, puzzled.

"They probably would think we were, like, making out or something," she explained, laughing, "I mean, we're not even a couple!"

"Yeah, I know..." Michael mumbled, watching Christine as she practically rolled around in hysterics. Then he reached over to her and placed his hand over her mouth, quieting her. He lay on his stomach next to her, shaking his head at her giggles.

"Sorry..." she choked out, trying to suppress her giggling. She then reached up and removed his hand from her mouth and rolled onto her side to face him.

"So... are you okay?" she asked after picking a fuzzy off his shirt. Her house seemed to thrive with fuzzies and cat fur, which had been stuck on her blanket and, naturally, were attracted to any article of clothing that came within a mile of the house. Not that the house wasn't clean, but she did have four cats.

"Yeah I guess..." Michael rolled on his side to face her. The thoughts that ran through Michael's mind, as she lay next to him and gazed at him with those bright blue eyes overcome with concern, caused guilt to run through Michael's veins like ice water.The fact that things were getting better at home hadn't stopped him from once again coming to her house, seeking her comfort. The fact that she was his younger sister's best friend, and was nearly two years younger than him didn't matter. And the fact that she would probably never want to be more than friends didn't stop his heart from racing when she gently brushed his hair out of his eyes.

"Are you sure? Do you wanna talk about it?" she asked.

Michael found himself gazing into her eyes and forced himself to look away, "Not really..." He would have given anything to tell her how he felt right then and there, but, he just, couldn't.

"-Kay..." Christine sighed. Anna (Michael's sister) had assured her that their home environment had been rapidly improving since their parent's divorce. But Michael's gentle brown eyes were filled with such genuine misery, she couldn't bring herself to doubt him. Even if it wasn't about his parents, he was upset, and she would always be there for him.

"-You going to just stay here tonight?" she asked

"If that's okay..."

"Of course it is Michael... always." she wrapped her arms around his neck and made him meet her gaze. "As long as my parents don't find you here and shoot you." she teased.

Michael laughed and clasped his hands together on his chest. He knew her arms being wrapped around him was not an invitation. Christine had been a 'touchy-feely' person as long as he'd know her, which had been about a year now. She was always hugging people and linking arms with them while walking, etc. And besides, it wasn't as if she hadn't done this about a million times before. Still, he struggled to keep his heart from racing and his body from trembling at her touch. It was torture to him to be around her like this, but he knew from experience that it was infinitely worse to stay away from her.

"Well, I don't know about you," she mumbled with a half-smile, "but I'm tired, so I'm going to sleep." Christine snuggled closer to him, resting her forehead on his chest with her arms still linked around him. She was surprised to feel his heart racing within his chest.

'Oh please,' she thought, 'Michael would never be interested in me. I'm probably just pissin' him off...' She grumbled to herself and began to pull away her arms. Then Michael, as if predicting her move, place his arm around her. A tiny shiver of excitement coursed through Christine when he touch her. His touch was so gentle, as if he was afraid he might break her. When in reality he was terrified she would 'blow up' at him for touching her and make him leave.

"Are you cold?" Michael whispered when he felt her shiver. Before she could reply, and certainly before he could think, Michael ran his warm hand over her back, between her sweat shirt and tank top. When his fingertips ran across her warm skin above her tank top he quickly pulled his hand away. He couldn't believe he had just done that. That wasn't something a 'friend's older brother' did! 'Smooth move Michael,' he grumbled silently to himself.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to..." he apologized, not breathing for fear that she would think this ackward. He couldn't bear the thought of hurting her in any way.

"No, that's okay..." she mumbled into his chest, snuggling closer.

Michael placed his hand on her back again, this time outside of her shirt. He took a deep breath and was overcome by the scent of her raspberry shampoo. Which, by the way, she had bought while at the store with both Michael and Anna about a week ago. Christine had flirted endlessly with him then, grinning her beautiful smile that would have made Michael content to stay in that stupid grocery store forever. She had made a big production of making them both smell all the different scents of shampoo before eventually choosing the first one she had picked up.

Apparently, taking deep breaths wasn't going to soothe Michael's already shot nerves.

"-Night Michael," Christine mumbled, playing with the hair on the back of his neck absently,"-hope it'll all be okay.."

"Me too," Michael whispered, "good-night." He rested his cheek on the top of her head on her ridiculous blue, fuzzy pillow.

After a minute or so Christine's breath grew slow and steady as she fell asleep. Michael lay awake listening to her breathing. He could feel his chest welling up as he ached to be able to tell her why he really kept coming back. He would have to, some day...

Michael took a deep breath and whispered into Christine's ear as she slept. "I love you, Christine, I swear it...." he said, choking on the admittance...

Ooo I liked this. So cute how they both like each other and the discription and everything, brilliant.

YAY; someone reading my stories! :D *hugs*

Thanks :)

Basically I used the same basic plot idea three times over the years to experiment with different writing styles, the next one is actually written in first person present tense (hehe) But I'm hoping for at least a few more readers before posting the next one *bats eyes and pouts hopefully at lurkers and other EWAC members*

Thanks again the1ringrulesdaworld, I'm glad you like it :)

WOW!!!! That was absolutely beautiful! I loved all of the description you used in this. I could imagine everything that you wrote.

I can't wait to read the next one!!! Great job!

*~Steph~*

:D Thanks

(And this would be number two of the three. Quite possibly my personal favorite because it's so strange. It's actually the only one of the three that does not feature a hammock, simply because a guy I was friends with at the time had a hammock instead of a bed. Unfortunatly, I made the mistake of sending the fic to another guy friend of mine, who automatically thought it was him and freaked slightly. However, I smacked him around a bit for the assumption (not really...well, hehe, maybe on the shoulder *shakes head* oiy), and that all got cleared up. The guy in the fic is NOT my best friend's boyfriend (nevermind that I don't have a best friend), the guy in the fic does not exist (shocker I know lol). Star was one of my [now ex-] best friend's character names, so that explains that line. Written July 03; enjoy!)

***I've been driving for an hour,
just talking to the rain...***

Damn it all, I always do this, and I don't know why. I guess it makes sense really. Why else would I hate my best friend for having a boyfriend? Because I need someone of my own to run to, but then, to be honest, so does she.

But that's beside the point. I'm going to regret this. I know it.

And yet here I am, knocking on his front door, soaking wet from the walk between my car and his front door. I'm so glad it's raining.

He's opened the door, a bit shocked to see me no doubt. I'm not the type to just show up at people's homes unanounced. I'm more the type of person to be okay with them doing so to me. But why do I always have to be the one taking care of everyone anyway?

Dear gawd I'm exhausted, and he can tell as soon as he opens his door and sees me standing there, looking like a drowned rat no doubt. Oh boy, would she ever get a kick out of me showing up here. Her and her damn snickering, I hate it I tell you, I really do.

He, of course, invites me in, and I wander over to his couch, lying down on it and staring up at the ceiling. Oh look, the little glow-in-the-dark stars I stuck up there without his knowledge are still there. How amusing.

Without a word he goes into his kitchen and starts making me a coffee. Forget the fact that it's 11 at night. It's not like I'm going to sleep any time in the near future. Maybe never again. Yea, I'll be like that Lisa chick who never slept, the sociopath, she was cool.

I'm so twisted. What is up with that anyway?

He left me to stare at the ceiling, knowing that I'd be fine on my own for a moment. I can hear him making coffee in the kitchen, if you can call it that. But who cares, he has his own place anyway. Unlike some people, who's parents still yell at them to get off the phone at midnight.

Silly them, not putting an alarm on my window. It's almost too easy, rather pathetic actually.

He comes back with two cups of coffee and switches on his radio. Something I happen to love, but I happen to know he doesn't like much. Silly boy, why the devil does he remember what I say anyway?

He asks me if I want to talk about it, and of course I don't. I'm still too busy staring at his ceiling as he takes a seat at the other end of the couch, near my feet. I watch my coffee out of the corner of my eye as it sits on the coffee table by the couch. Stupid coffee's too far away, so I have to sit up and get it.

It's not like I was going to let perfectly good coffee go to waste. Are you insane?!

He pulls out his laptop computer as he sips his coffee and starts typing away at some term paper I'm sure. The punk just HAS to rub it in that he's more studious than I am. So sue me, like i really give a crap.

I yawn and explain that I just had to get out of my house, because the walls were closing in on me. Which of course, he already knew, he's not stupid. So I go back to staring at the glow in the dark stars, which of course, aren't glowing, because the light's on.

So I get up and turn it off, switching the song on the radio as I go by. He can still see his stupid laptop screen anyway. Then I return to my place on the couch and stare up at the stars.

Unfortunatly, it was just too dark in there, for obvious reasons. One being that I'm a girl, who shows up at a guys appartment in the middle of the night, to drink his coffee and stare at the ceiling. Forgive me for being a freak.

I get up and turn the lights back on, yawning again. But of course, I'm not tired, remember, I'm never going to sleep again anyway. Regardless, I yawn again and stretch out on the couch, kicking him in the side as I do so. Whoops.

He just glances at me, shakes his head, and goes back to typing. Man is he ever boring. Maybe I creep him out, just showing up like this. I should probably leave, but i'm not going to.

Why is it so cold? Oh crap, great. I got his stupid couch all wet with the rain water from my clothes. So i excuse myself and get up to wander to the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I yawn and search under the sink. Believe me, you don't want to go searching under some guy's bathroom sink, you're just bound to find something you wish you hadn't.

Now where is that stupid blow dryer I left here anyway? Ah ha! I do my best to dry my hair, ignoring the fact that I can't stop freaking yawning, despite the coffee, which i'd finished before even disappearing into the bathroom. I attempt to dry my clothes too, which is pointless.

So of course I sneak into his room and snatch one of his shirts. I can't help it! I have a thing for guy's button up shirts. Believe me, this is not the first time this has happened. In fact, I find a pair of running shorts (clean of course) and snatch them as well, disappearing back into the bathroom.

It's an interesting outfit, I can tell you that much. But forget it, I'm too tired to care anyway. I mean, tired? What's tired?

I wander back into his room. Mmmm bed, nice, soft bed. Sleepy time. No, bad. Mustn't sleep ever! Still, he's not using it, and it's not like there's anywhere else to go in this stinking small apartment, other than back into the bathroom or kitchen/living room.

Ahh yes... nappy time... sleeeeeeepppp... I mean, I'm just resting my eyes, really!

Oh and what is he laughing at anyway? Stupid boy, don't you know it's rude to linger in doorways? Didn't he ever watch The Little Mermaid? Jeezzz do I have to tell him everything? Boys, I swear...they're so dumb sometimes.

What does he want anyway? So what if it's after midnight? I've stolen his bed, too bad, it's mine now. Okay, i guess we can share, since it is technically his bed.

But he'd better stay the hell away from me. I mean it mister, a good ten feet at least- Do I care that the bed isn't even ten feet wide? Stop being such a smarty pants you butt. I swear, that boy, I'm gonna hurt him one of these days.

At least he's wearing a shirt and pajama pants. God knows I don't need to see him in anything less. Who cares that we're good friends, I'm just non-napping on his bed. That doesn't mean a thing.

Oh shut up, what do you know anyway.

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY won't the stupid boy shut up already!? I came here to not-sleep. Now how can I do that with him being so curious about why I'm not-crying. Because I'm not crying.

Just like I'm not going to fall asleep, ever.

I told him I don't want to talk about it. But we both know I'm full of crap. So out comes the whole story. Dying relative, pissed off friend....but none of that is why I'm really crying. I'd like to pretend he doesn't know that. Esspecially since I've allowed him to hug me, now that we're sitting up. Still on that stupid bed I tell you, he should have just let me non-sleep in peace.

But no... and now I have to admit that the reason I'm really crying is because I'm scared. No, try... terrified. To the point of not being able to breathe. And not just about some things, about everything.

Will i ever figure out what I want to do? Will I ever get a good job? Suceed? Do something to be remembered by? Get over my past? Stop hurting? Not have to force myself to do my homework? Not have to force myself to even get up in the morning? Will I ever stop being a selfish spoiled little princess? Will I ever fall in love? Is love really just a bunch of crap? Will everybody just up and decide to hate me one day? Will i be left all alone? Will i fail at everthing i attempt? Am I really going to die fat and alone and be discovered three weeks later, half eaten by the thirteen cats that I don' t even have?

Man I'm a mess, can't you tell. But he puts up with me, hugging me and all that. Telling me I'm being silly. That I'm worrying over nothing. That I'm not a horrible person, and that people aren't going to just leave me. People don't just up and leave people they love, he claims.

Whatever you say hun.

Besides, he tells me, you're only allowed to own three cats. So no worries about being eaten by thirteen. Boy am I relieved, not. He thinks he's just soooo funny.

He tells me that all the stupid guys who were jerks to me, were just well...jerks anyway. And definatly not worth my time. Who cares about them anyway right?...Right???

He tells me that I'm going to become a famous rock star whom everyone will adore.

Stop laughing.

I tell him he's full of it, but he claims it's true. He's pretty naive isn't he?

But at least I'm laughing now, as he does impressions of my future adoring fans. And of course he informs me that I have to send all the chick his way, since he's so wonderful.

Actually, I tell him this, teasing him. He still thinks he isn't a good person because of his past. God only knows why. I've told him a million times that he's full of it.This boy is darn stubborn I tell you.

Almost as stubborn as me!... but not quite.

This is rather amusing, despite the fact that the world is out to get me (really, it is!) He tells me, sarcastically, that they're bugging my house in order to make sure they can ruin my life to the full extent.

I tell him he's mean.

But then I start yawning again, so he lets me lie back down and attempt to non-sleep again. He's still laughing to himself as I begin to doze off, my back pressed up against his. I thought I told him to stay away....I'm not yawning!...oh who cares?

Besides, all that I was ever really afraid of was that I'd never feel safe. And even with his back touching mine, for one of the few times in my life, I kind of do...

Stop snickering Star...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

First I have to say I was sooo in love with Michael/Robert when Princess Diaires came out!! hehehe. You're first story was so gorgeous. Beautifully written. :)

The second was absolutely hilarious hehehe

My gaaawd that was funny! The whole reference to the little mermaid. and No I'm not a little mermaid fan who can recite the whole movie...lmao.

can't wait for the next story :)

Thankyouthankyouthankyou :D Yea, I really don't remember where that came from Hehe, I reference the most random things in my writing *laughs*

Third part is coming...eventually (Moo haha ;))

Always good to have friends to fall back on when we need them. Your shortie was great, in showing this can't wait for the next one.

Ooooo I like! I like!
The descriptions are wonderful! And, I'm loving your sarcasm. Teehee... ^_^

~Stacy~

The second storoy was hilarious!!! But it also showed that there are always those around you that will be there whenyou need them! Great job hun!!!!

*~Steph~*

:D Thanks lovelys, you're the best-est. :)

(I'm feeling generous (Lol!) So here is the last of the three fics :) This one I wrote toward the end of the summer during which I wrote the last one. Thanks to everyone who's been reading; you girls are the best *hugs* I hope you like! :))

I woke up to find myself halfway off the hammock. Had his arm not been tightly wrapped around me, I know I would have slammed face down onto the ground outside the cabin. I tucked my legs back onto the hammock and carefully ran my fingertips along his arms. Never before had I felt so secure, so sure that we could make it.

As I felt his gentle breaths against my neck, that familiar feeling of guilt washed over me. No matter how secure this made me feel, there'd be hell to pay if I didn't get up right then. And whether or not someone found us wasn't even the biggest issue.

I knew what was coming, what he'd say as soon as he woke up and realized we'd fallen asleep together the night before. I felt like a child, who'd done something wrong and was trying to cover up my tracks before anyone found out, as I slipped out of his grasp. It was more often than not that I felt like a child next to him anyway.

I moved to a nearby chair and sat down facing him, trying not to watch him sadly as he slept. Trying to pretend that his mere presence didn't make me feel safer than I could remember ever feeling before. And that fact alone made me want to crawl back into his arms, but, as usual, I had far too much to loose. Pulling my knees to my chest in the chair I remembered the night before.

If only I could forget, having to be drug out of the kitchen after screaming at that girl who'd accused me of being selfish and immature. Lunging at her fighting mad and having to be pulled, kicking and fuming to the brim, out of there, only supported her accusation.

Once outside he had pulled me away from the rest of them and grabbed me by my shoulders, "What were you thinking?" he looked at me in disbelief.

"If she's going to accuse me of being something, then I might as well be it" I fumed, glaring over his shoulder at nothing. He caught my chin and made me make eye contact with him then. He liked to do that sort of thing, make eye contact with someone when he talked to them. In my case it allowed him to read me loud and clear, so I avoided doing so if at all possible. We'd always been that way, even before we really knew each other; he'd always been able to see right through me.

As soon as I lifted my blazing ocean eyes to his soft brown eyes, a wave of understanding washed over him, "Julianna..." he started.

"I'm going to feel like crap about it later on anyway. Might as well have a good reason too" He just looked back at me when I hissed the words through my clenched teeth. Then he put his arm securely around my shoulder and led me back to the cabins.

Moments later we had sat on the hammock outside their cabin, both facing opposite directions. I was still refusing to speak or even look at him, and he was just waiting patiently. I was more mad at myself than anyone else, even the girl, whom I'd only threatened because I believed she was right and I didn't want to hear about it. But what else was new?

He just sat there and watched me as I fought back furious tears. He knew I hated it when he did that, but he did so just the same, knowing that eventually I'd have to look at him. And so I had, but only with the intention of thanking him for putting up with my crap and then to tell him to go the heck away. Instead, I took one look at his knowing eyes and burst into fresh tears.

"I hate this so much! Always feeling guilty! Always with the constant ache in my heart! I can't stand it!" I ran my fingernails across my arms desperately, leaving scratch marks before he quickly reached out and grabbed both my hands.

"You know it's all just lies you're telling yourself," he said.

I'd let my arms go limp when he'd grabbed my hands, "Well, I'm a pretty convincing liar then." I whimpered, my voice shaking. I hated breaking down in front of people, especially when they could read me as well as him and some of my other close friends.

"Jules..." He wrapped one arm carefully around my shoulder. He was always like that, always careful, didn't want to give anyone the wrong idea, terrified of doing the wrong thing. Like me almost, but I had unfortunately gotten into the habit of not giving a shit now and then, so blinded by my hatred towards no one but myself.

I shoved him away from me, causing the hammock to swing violently, "Don't give me that!" I spat, "You don't understand!" The default accusation fell out of my mouth before I could remind myself to whom I was speaking.

He sat back and narrowed his eyes at me, "I don't understand!? Julianna Larson, you forget who you're talking to!" He glared at me, "You think I don't know?! You think that I don't know what it feels like to feel like I don't even deserve to get better!?" He trailed off, infuriated at me.

I couldn't find the nerve within myself to even beg him for forgiveness. So I sat there, frozen and staring at him in helpless terror as he ranted. When he'd seen the look on my face he'd snapped his mouth shut and just looked at me helplessly.

"Julianna... I'm sorry, I didn't..." He just turned away from me and stared off into the trees. I watched him helplessly as he buried his face in his hands, trying to fend off his own fall. "I'm sorry I went off like that... But you understand, and you know that I understand what happened back there..." His voice shook slightly as he spoke.

I had just sat there, frozen in confusion. Here, he was supposed to be the stronger, older one, and yet we were in practically the same place. Both helplessly hating ourselves.

After a moment of us both sitting there in silence, me watching him and him watching the trees, our roles flip floped from a moment before, I reached out and carefully touched his shoulder. As he flinched away I quickly drew back my hand, muttering an apology.

I spoke as he turned to look at me again, "Am I not even allowed to hug you?"

He shifted his gaze uncomfortably toward the ground, "Jules..." he warned.

But I didn't feel like listening, "Honestly! We're friends, so what's the problem. For crying out loud, am I not even allowed to hug you as my "brother"?" I made quotation marks in the air with my fingers.

He just lifted his gaze back to mine again and winced as I continued, "Is it so horrible to just need someone to hold onto to keep from falling of the face of the earth!?" I choked out, tears beginning to make their way down my face again. He then reached out and wrapped his arm around me and I scooted closer, clinging to him as I gasped for breath through my frustrated sobs.

I could feel his body shake from trying to hold back sobs as he buried his face in the side of my neck and held onto me. "Quite a pair we make" He joked and I let out a little laugh through my tears, my forehead pressed against his cheek. Then we had just rocked back and forth in the hammock, trying not to cry and holding onto each other as we fought with ourselves.

I blinked back tears as I remembered, knowing that disaster was going to strike as soon as he awoke. He'd barely been alright with the idea of us hugging each other, and so, defiantly wasn't going to like the rest of it. To me us falling asleep there didn't seem like much, nothing had happened, of course... but to him, since he was supposed to be the older, stronger one like I'd mentioned before... I stared off into space, waiting for hell to break loose.

After a few minutes I heard him grumble and I turned back to him in time to see him open his eyes and carefully sit up. His brown eyes focused on me in sleepy confusion.

"Hey there," I said, trying to act nonchalant. I winced as he sat up straight, having realized what the devil I was doing there. He muttered something and then pressed his fingers to his temples, "Jules, why are you still here?" he asked nervously.

He swung his legs over to the other side of the hammock, facing away from me. "How should I know, I fell asleep just the same as you." I snapped, glaring at the back of him.

"You should leave before this gets any worse." he said carefully.

Not carefully enough for me, "What "worse"?! Nothing happened! What is the big deal?!"

"The big deal is that I shouldn't be sleeping anywhere near you!" His shoulders tensed but he remained facing away from me, "There are so many things wrong with that Julianna, and you know it!"

"Gee," I spat, "I thought something actually had to happen for you to regret it"

He just turned around and glared at me, "Don't get petty on me Jules." he warned. Then he turned back away from me, "We defiantly shouldn't be spending any time alone anymore."

I sat up and my feet hit the ground with an angry thud, "Come again?" I choked out.

He just ran his hand through his hair and stood up, his back still to me. I just sat there, choking back bitter tears. "I should have known" I scoffed.

"Should have known what Jules?" He asked, sounding exhausted.

"That letting you in meant you'd leave me all alone; happens every time." I clenched my teeth together, hating myself for wanting to hurt him for betraying me, "Silly, naive me. I should have known better."

"Julianna!" He spun around, "Stop it, now!" I just stared at him in defiance, and blinked. Nothing is more effective than a well timed blink in my experience, just ask some of my friends.

"I am not leaving you all alone!" He chewed on his bottom lip and looked over me at the trees, "You have other people-"

"-Don't bother." I said flatly, "You don't owe me anything." He still gazed over me, his eyes unfocused. "I'm just some stupid little girl who thought she could trust you." Without a word, he turned around and walked swiftly away from me.

Before I realized what I was doing, I found myself charging up behind him and calling his name furiously, "Wait just a second!" He stopped and turned back around to me, so I continued, "You're just going to let me say that, and then walk off and never come back?!"

"Don't be ridiculous; we'll see eachother at breakfast, and lunch, and so on." He acted as if nothing was going on. Maybe nothing was. "And don't pull that "I'll say something I know isn't true so that you'll tell me I'm wrong" thing. I know you too well to not see through that."

"Why is it, that no matter what I do, I always feel like I'm being a child next to you?" I fumed.

"How should I know, I'm no model example-" he started.

"-No kidding" I scoffed and he bit his lip again, holding back words. Then, he shot me a hurt look and turned to walk away. "Wait!" I stepped infront of him, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it."

He just shrugged and laughed at himself. "Does it really matter? I'm suposed to be the role model here, and I'm doing a lousy job."

"To heck with that!" I broke in, "I'm 21, I don't need you as a role model anymore." He looked past me.

"But I do need you as a friend." I added.

He looked me straight in the eyes, "Don't," he said flatly.

"And why not?" I felt trapped under his gaze, just like always.

"We can't keep acting the way we have. You can't depend on me the way you do; we can't-"

"You mean we have to do the whole "brother and sister in Christ" thing." I noted, pretending that I didn't love the color of his eyes. Did I just think that?...

"Don't act so exasperated about it Jules..."

I moved closer to him, looking him straight in the eyes, letting my eyes show a bit more of what was behind them, "Kevin and I hug." I said flatly, "And we joke around," He drew in a sharp breath, but that didn't stop me, "And he doesn't act like putting his arm around my shoulder will send him straight to hell. And he's freaking engaged to my best friend! So I don't know, what the heck-"

"That. is. different!" He ground his teeth a bit. I glared at him, "How so!?" I cried out, "Tell me please! Because I just don't understand what is so bad about-"

He grabbed me by my shoulders and held onto them tightly, "You deserve to depend on some man who's your age, and isn't-"

"What the heck is that suposed to mean!?" He looked at me in shock, terrified of God knows what. "I am not a child anymore! I don't need to "go play" with little boys my own age!" He just stared at me, and yet his focus was somewhere else.

"You don't understand Julia!" He begged me to stop fighting with him with his eyes.

"Understand what?!" I screamed in frustration.

"You don't understand how much I want to just grab you, and kiss you, and hold you! But I can't because it isn't okay!!" He snapped his mouth shut, as if in shock at what had just come out of it.

"Wh...What?" I stammered, unable to breath. The look in his eyes made me want to scream, I ached so badly for him.

He let go of my shoulders and turned away, walking up to a tree and leaning against it as if exhausted, "I shouldn't have said that," he choked out. He swore under his breath and then pressed his forehead against his arm, which was up against the tree.

Shock washed over me as I stood there watching him. All I could have done was what I did then. I walked over to him and made him look at me, "Why not?" I asked softly.

"Because we would never work." he answered quietly.

"Why not?" I asked again, gently touching his face, my whole body shaking.

"Julianna... don't" He mumbled as I stepped closer and wrapped my arms tightly around him, pressing my cheek to his shoulder. "Why not?" I said again, laughing a bit, though I was trembling all over.

He leaned away from the tree and wrapped his arms around me, carefully at first. But then he grabbed onto me tightly and pulled me close. "I'm in love with you Jules." He mumbled into my neck, his heart pounding in his chest.

I smiled and held him tight, "Good, because I love you too." I pulled back and he pressed his forehead down against mine, "And God knows how awkward it would have been if you didn't love me back. I might have had to have Skye beat you up." I joked.

He laughed, and then pulled me close again. We held onto each other for dear life, and guess what; niether one of us fell off the face of the earth.

eep!! :bow: So beautifully written m'dear I loved it. It was emotional and a great end to your trilogy *nods* I is sad there is no more *pouts*

Awww! The ending of that was so beautiful!!! A great ending to the trilogy! It's too bad there isn't more, but I hope to read more of your stuff soon! Great job hun! :hug:

*~Steph~*

:eek:

Ok I really loved the last one. The emotion the confusion then the relief at the end. You captured it so well, and wow fantastic. Thanks for sharring.

Thanks so much for reading girls *hugs* :) :) :)

Yay! I read them...just for you Julianna dahling. It was of course, amazing! Just like you :) You surprise me with every passing day. Can't wait to see what story you're going to turn out next! ~Alli~

Thanks Alli! :D I'm glad you liked them :)